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Drunk Duck Mafia XXXII - Anarchy in Townston.
Product Placement at 4:59PM, July 29, 2010
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Night 2 narration:

“OH DEAR LORD! What is this crap!?” shouted the street cleaner, as he observed the mess after the brawl. “-Screw that! I'm not cleaning this up!”

Indeed the town was a mess. Most of the stores had broken windows and burning trashcans lay scattered all over the place. The town looked like a war zone which was fitting, since tonight promised to bring no end to the violence.

Angered by how the lynch turned out, this villager observed what had happened to the town. It was his hope that his rival would have died today and was displeased that he had escaped unharmed.
“You seem to be looking for someone.” said the serial killer, prompting the villager to turn around. “- I figured we had unfinished business.”
“So this is how it's going to turn out? You, killing me like you killed Harkovast?” replied the villager.
“Oh, don't be so dramatic. You're getting your wish.” said the serial killer and slammed the semi blunt edge of his dull machete in the neck of his opponent. This was a cruel weapon of choice. One that requires quite allot of force to hack your opponent with and causes great harm to the target as it does.
The villager fell to the ground in agony as the serial killer knelt over him.
“I know I'm destined to hell but at least you'll be going to a better place.” he said and placed a cross on his body before prepping himself for the final blow.

A bullet pierced his shoulder before the murderer was allowed to finish his deed. Ignoring the pain he turns around to see his attacker with a smoking gun in his hand.
“Well hello there, Mr Hero. Did you like my handiwork from last night?” Asked the serial killer.
“Cut the crap. I'm no hero, even if I'm doing what's necessary.”
“Ah but isn't that what heroes do? Fight injustice. Kill those who have wronged. Harkovast killed a defenseless man, that night. He needed to be punished. With that thought, you got there too late. It was I who killed him. Maybe it is I who's the hero.”
“Is that why you're killing random passerbyers then?”
“He tried to kill me today. He needed to be punished. It's what heroes do.”
“Enough of your stupid games. We're ending this now.”
“So be it Mr.Hero. Join my club. I'm sure you'll like it.”
“Yeah, yeah. I'd say I'd hate to kill you but I would be lying then.”

The gunman aimed his gun again and cocked the hammer. So focused was he on his target that he didn't notice the burning trashcan coming flying at him from behind. As it hit his back, the gun let off sending the deadly payload exploring the sky. The serial killer did not waste this opportunity to run into Harks house for cover. The gunman quickly rolled the burning hot barrel off him as he turned to look upon a hand wielding a knife coming at him.
“I hear that dying can be quite traumatic. Should you need it, I can help you accept the situation” said the attacker as he stabbed the knife into the side of the gunman.
Even though it missed the vital organs the pain was enough to shock the gunman, leaving him defenseless for a precious second. The attacker raised his knife again to finish the job.

“Get out of here! I got you covered!” Said the bodyguard as he grabbed the knife wielding hand and pinned the attacker to the ground.
The gunman quickly responded by picking up his gun and going after the serial killer.
“Dammit you meddlesome pest!” shouted the hitman as he struggled to get loose. “-what give you the right to interfere?”
“Causing me to loose my job is one thing but let's just say I don't like you” responded the bodyguard.
“Well, it's a good thing I brought backup then.” snorted the hitman as the bodyguard was suddenly struck into his back by another hitman that came out of nowhere.
“Heh. You weren't expecting this now, were you?” said the second hitman cheerfully.

Meanwhile, inside Hark's house the gunman was busy looking for his target. The trail of blood from his shoulder wound let him straight to the living room, where the serial killer could be found squatting under a recliner.
“Jesus man. Why hasn't anyone picked up these bodies yet?” asked the gunman in revolt as he almost stumbled upon the dead villagers, lying on the floor.
“Beats me.” replied the serial kiler from under the chair. “-Guess people must have been really preoccupied today, what with all the fighting.”
“Right then. Get away from that chair. You're a terrible at hiding.”
“That's true.” said the serial killer with a smirk as he presented his foe with an active bomb. “-I've always been better at finding.”
The serial killer threw the bomb towards the gunman who barely catches it out of fear that it would go off. The first thing he sees are the numbers 6 - 5 - 4 -
“I guess we're going out together.” said the serial killer with a smile.

The gunman drops the explosive payload and heads for outside. He barely reaches the doorframe before he is propelled the rest of the way by the explosive force. Out the living room window a badly scorched person is flung out to the street.

The gunman picks himself up and looks around. His bodyguard is lying unconscious on the ground but his attackers are nowhere in sight.
He pushes against his sore back that has had to endure allot of punishment tonight and is reminded of his wound which angrily signals his nerve endings.
“Ugh. That's enough action for tonight.” he says to himself and heads home to patch himself up.

Harkovast the Paranoid and Same the Mad Hatter are even deader now.

Zeph, Hakoshen and Ochitsukanai are unconscious.

Night 2 is over.

Day 3 has begun.
Those were my two cents.
If you have any other questions, please deposit a quarter.
This space for rent.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:53PM
Niccea at 5:02PM, July 29, 2010
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Ok. I need three volunteers to be Suspects for my Mafia Choose Your Own Adventure. Please tell me. Also, could you submit a bio about your Townston self? Ok. I need three volunteers to be Suspects for my Mafia Choose Your Own Adventure. Please tell me. Also, could you submit a bio about your Townston self?

Also…

Poor Ochi. Someone revive her.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:14PM
Product Placement at 5:15PM, July 29, 2010
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Just to clarify. The paramedic can only revive during days. He's now allowed to pick either Maru, Zeph, Hakoshen or Ochitsukanai and save one of them, while the rest dies.

Whether or not he does that, is up to him.
Those were my two cents.
If you have any other questions, please deposit a quarter.
This space for rent.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:53PM
seventy2 at 5:19PM, July 29, 2010
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wow. epic. this is epic.

one of the unconscious people is a body guard. and one is the vigilante (the gunman if i'm not mistaken) so this is two in three. however, as previously fought over, zeph or Ochitsukanai is the serial killer. so if the medic revives one of them, than that's bad news…… maru being a townee has better odds in this.
facara
Running Anew an exercise blog.
I'm gonna love you till the money comes, half of it's gonna be mine someday.
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:30PM
crocty at 5:22PM, July 29, 2010
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Ochi….Hakoshen….

I will avenge your deaths.

Paramedic, you have a choice. I'm fairly certain that Hakoshen is the bodyguard, whereas Ochi is but a townie. A helpful townie, but still a townie.

Up to you who you revive, but definitely revive one of them.

I'll have a go at solving the clues, but bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh I suck.
THIS NEW SITE SUCKS I'M LEAVING FOREVER I PROMISE, GUYS.
NOT BLUFFING, I'M GONE IF YOU DON'T FIX IT.
Oh god I'm so alone someone pay attention to me
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:54AM
Product Placement at 5:28PM, July 29, 2010
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seventy2
wow. epic. this is epic.
^^

To all those who have commented positively on my narrations: Thank you.
Those were my two cents.
If you have any other questions, please deposit a quarter.
This space for rent.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:53PM
jninjashadow at 5:30PM, July 29, 2010
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Niccea
Ok. I need three volunteers to be Suspects for my Mafia Choose Your Own Adventure. Please tell me. Also, could you submit a bio about your Townston self? Ok. I need three volunteers to be Suspects for my Mafia Choose Your Own Adventure. Please tell me. Also, could you submit a bio about your Townston self?
I will volunteer!
Name: Jninjashadow
Aka: Jninja, Ninja, Jay, Matagy
Bio: He stumbled into Townston drunk and confused back when it was a cowboy trading outpost. He quickly earned the moniker of Town Drunk for his near constant consumption of whiskey. He happened upon a pile of scrap that he welded together making Townston's first and only bar and pawn shop “Jninja's Loot & Hooch”. So used to alcohol, Jninja is in a sort of meta-drunk state which puts him in a zen like demeanor of complete apathy, leaving him with a near constant bored or uninterested look, save for a few random out busts of “passionate” over emoting. He has a pathological NEED to dress as eccentrically as possible with his common wears being a black corduroy jacket, a black fedora with a red band, and a monocle, though he wears several variations of this as the situation dictates. He lives in the basement of the Loot & Hooch where in he keeps his many cloth sets, liqueurs, insane modes of transportation, and this various attempts at playing God. Oh and he may have a mech somewhere down there… It is more than likely he is insane.
Why that's just crazy enough to walrus!
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:09PM
Niccea at 5:32PM, July 29, 2010
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OH sorry. Ninja. You are ineligible this round. You are an NPC.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:14PM
jninjashadow at 5:35PM, July 29, 2010
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Niccea
You are an NPC.
To use the inventory press… Wait… AN NP-FUCKIN-C?… wait… I don't die tho right?
Why that's just crazy enough to walrus!
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:09PM
Niccea at 5:42PM, July 29, 2010
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No. You don't die. In the story, the reader can go into the bar and ask you if you know anything about the murder.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:14PM
Hakoshen at 6:00PM, July 29, 2010
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I'll be a suspect! But… too lazy to think of a bio right now.
God needed the Devil, the Beatles needed the Rolling Stones, Hakoshen needs me.
I'm the enemy he requires to define him.
Soon or later, he'll bring me back to life again for another epic encounter of shouting about power levels and grimacing.
-Harkovast
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:42PM
same at 6:04PM, July 29, 2010
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Name: Same

AKA: Ginger, Passerby boy, other names that i dont wish to discuss *Clears throat*

Bio: Alone in the town, he stays allianceless. He came to townston a few years ago as a On occasion taking commands providing he cant think of anything better to be doing. A hired hand. Taking the dirty jobs that noone else wants to do. And by this of course i mean plumbing.He is a man of little words. Or atleast little are listened to.
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:21PM
I Am The 1337 Master at 7:25PM, July 29, 2010
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Your bio will say “I am you. You are me. We are one.”

I should be lynched.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:54PM
Salsa at 8:58PM, July 29, 2010
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Know what?

I feel like chunking some monkey wrenches into some plans.

I'M THE MAD BOMBER!!



D8

Yes You read that right I am the mad bomber!
RAGE!
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:18PM
jninjashadow at 9:37PM, July 29, 2010
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Salsa
Know what?

I feel like chunking some monkey wrenches into some plans.

I'M THE MAD BOMBER!!

D8

Yes You read that right I am the mad bomber!
Wha… Buh… BUH…
Also I am the serial murderer
Why that's just crazy enough to walrus!
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:09PM
I Am The 1337 Master at 6:11AM, July 30, 2010
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mad hatter and mad bomber are same and hark is both. and he's also dead.

lynch me.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:54PM
Product Placement at 7:44AM, July 30, 2010
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-Looks at the lynch results-

Really now guys. You can't expect the town to win, if you're not voting during the day.

I'm seriously considering enforcing the inactivity rule. Players who haven't done anything by the end of the 3rd night will die from acute case of laziness (that means that townies who have never voted by the end of today are pretty much screwed).
Those were my two cents.
If you have any other questions, please deposit a quarter.
This space for rent.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:53PM
Kroatz at 8:12AM, July 30, 2010
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It's pur anarchy.
Everybody lynch herio!
Comidion.deviantart.com
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:24PM
I Am The 1337 Master at 8:18AM, July 30, 2010
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Product Placement
-Looks at the lynch results-

Really now guys. You can't expect the town to win, if you're not voting during the day.

I'm seriously considering enforcing the inactivity rule. Players who haven't done anything by the end of the 3rd night will die from acute case of laziness (that means that townies who have never voted by the end of today are pretty much screwed).
tis why I voted.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:54PM
jninjashadow at 8:23AM, July 30, 2010
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You know what…. RIOT TIME AGAIN! Townies, loyal or other I say we should all evenly split our vote between myself and 1337 to force a riot of random proportions! therefore, I am voting to lynch myself, in hopes of a riot!… unless no one votes at which case it would be a two man riot… which would make for a hilarious narration…
Why that's just crazy enough to walrus!
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:09PM
Salsa at 8:54AM, July 30, 2010
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Better make that three.

I can't go on any longer. LYNCH ME! For I am the God Father!

RAGE!
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:18PM
Mettaur at 8:56AM, July 30, 2010
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Count me in on this.

And google, one of the few good things mankind made.
Been years since I was here. I've been at rehab since. So uh. Yknow, things got interesting.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:01PM
jninjashadow at 8:56AM, July 30, 2010
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Four way riot… LETS DO EEEEEEET!
Also… I think i found something that sums up mafia quite well;
Why that's just crazy enough to walrus!
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:09PM
Mettaur at 9:10AM, July 30, 2010
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You even got the pig. Well job done.
Been years since I was here. I've been at rehab since. So uh. Yknow, things got interesting.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:01PM
crocty at 10:08AM, July 30, 2010
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….*SIGN*
Okay, I haven't looked through the clues, and to be honest, the way these narratives are written, I can't tell which murder is which…
First narrative: Serial killer kills a townie
Second narrative: Serial killer shoots the guy who just killed the townie in the shoulder. @________?

I am just going to vote for Niccea, she was definitely acting dodgy for Ochi, and when straight up accused by her, Niccea seems to say nothing.
Also she voted for me along side the serial killer.
And that's.
No.
Good.

Also a reminder to the paramedic: Revive Hakoshen or Ochi plox.
THIS NEW SITE SUCKS I'M LEAVING FOREVER I PROMISE, GUYS.
NOT BLUFFING, I'M GONE IF YOU DON'T FIX IT.
Oh god I'm so alone someone pay attention to me
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:54AM
jninjashadow at 10:19AM, July 30, 2010
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Hey medic, revive Zeph… it would be fun… well him or if you want to be useful maru. She is least likely to be anti-townie. Also I still want to make the vote end in the biggest tie possible to make one hell of a brawl! C'mon guys, lets stretch PP's creative limits here!
Why that's just crazy enough to walrus!
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:09PM
I Am The 1337 Master at 10:21AM, July 30, 2010
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Niccea is, and always will be, evil but we shall have a group suicide soon.

Who's got the punch?

…Line…


Now I can sum up that I know the identity of jninja, salsa, and Kroatz.
Possibly Mettaur.
they're all krillin
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:54PM
Product Placement at 10:32AM, July 30, 2010
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-looks at lynch results again-

… oh, you people are nothing short of the embodiment of all evil.
Those were my two cents.
If you have any other questions, please deposit a quarter.
This space for rent.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:53PM
Zeph at 10:43AM, July 30, 2010
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For those who still care. And read the authors comment ont he last page to figure out why I'm not adding anymore characters to this story arc.
Comic The Mutha Flippin God of Airsoft

Rockin the WTF face.
CLEARLY AN OUTRAGE! CLEARLY!
wait what?
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:57PM
I Am The 1337 Master at 10:47AM, July 30, 2010
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posts: 3,785
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Product Placement
-looks at lynch results again-

… oh, you people are nothing short of the embodiment of all evil.
at least salsa, jninja, and I are creative.


To Zeph:
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:54PM

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