Debate and Discussion

Gender Inequality for Male Victims?
Aurora Moon at 4:57AM, Jan. 30, 2008
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It seems that nowadays, that in some cases men are actually being discriminated against when they're the victims of certain crimes.

Cases of which I'm talking about:

1. Men who has been raped by women has a difficult time getting justice for what was done to them.
Mainly because of the fact that there's this misconception that all men are supposedly strong, powerful and able to overpower any women who even attempted to give them such unwanted attention. That misconception often will work against them in court.
Even worse, they get ridiculed or looked down upon if it was found out that they got raped by women. such a viewpoint comes from the fact that society has built an unfortunate bias and social pressure about how men are supposed to act, etc.

So in short, those men are being treated worse than how women used to be treated if they ever got raped.

And for those who doubt that such a thing could be possible, here's links:
http://www.iafrica.com/news/sa/476786.htm
http://www.aest.org.uk/survivors/male/myths_about_male_rape.htm
http://www.fathermag.com/news/rape/
http://after-words.org/malerape.htm
http://www.nycagainstrape.org/survivors_factsheet_38.html

From the last link I would like to highlight this fact:
Male rape victims not only have to confront unsympathetic attitudes if they choose to press charges, they also often hear unsupportive statements from their friends, family and acquaintances (Brochman, 1991). People will tend to fault the male victim instead of the rapist. Stephen Donaldson, president of Stop Prisoner Rape (a national education and advocacy group), says that the suppression of knowledge of male rape is so powerful and pervasive that criminals such as burglars and robbers sometimes rape their male victims as a sideline solely to prevent them from going to the police.

There are many reasons that male victims do not come forward and report being raped, but perhaps the biggest reason for many males is the fear of being perceived as homosexual. However, male sexual assault has nothing to do with the sexual orientation of the attacker or the victim, just as a sexual assault does not make the victim survivor gay, bisexual or heterosexual. It is a violent crime that affects heterosexual men as much as gay men. The phrase “homosexual rape,” for instance, which is often used by uninformed persons to designate male-male rape, camouflages the fact that the majority of the rapists are not generally homosexual (Donaldson, 1990).

It seems that my Google powers are weak as seeing I couldn't find more links on different various cases that I had read in the past. (Inducing the case of an married man who was too drunk to drive home, and so stayed at a friend's house where the party was taking place. Only to find some strange woman on top of him in the middle of the night.)

There's even people saying that if the alleged male victims had an erection, then that must had meant that they enjoyed it. Wrong!!
Men cannot control their erections. Sometimes even when they aren't feeling aroused at all, their genitals will become erect anyway. This often happens to young teens, but It can even happen to men in their 20's or older too as well. That is, if there was some kind of simulation regardless of the men's state of non-arousal (or however you say it).
Much like how an woman's lower bits can become moist provided that it had enough simulation, regardless of whenever the women wanted the simulation or not.

2. Domestic abuse. When I say it, I bet you're picturing a man beating up some woman. However, there's been cases of women beating up the men too. Believe it or not, but there are still men who had been raised to believe that it was wrong to hit a woman, no matter what the situation. So They reuse to defend themselves if the women they marry, turns out to be the abusive type. This often results in death, or sereve injuries for the men.
There aren't that many help centers for abused men, so often those men feel like they have no place to go. And worse, if they do defend themselves in some way… then the cops can be easily called in to arrest the men. Even though the abusive women were clearly in the wrong.

There's plenty of help out there for female victims of any spefic crime. There's support centers, information on how the female victims can feel normal again, etc…

But there's not that much support for any of the male victims out there, espeically the male rape victims.

If We are truly equal, then why is it that nobody seems willing to realize that even men can be just as equally helpless in some aspects? Why shouldn't they be given the same considerations that they give women nowadays?

Disscuss.
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last edited on July 14, 2011 11:10AM
mlai at 7:15AM, Jan. 30, 2008
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OK then, why the sudden concern regarding male victims of sexual assault/abuse? Is there a news story I don't know about?

FIGHT current chapter: Filling In The Gaps
FIGHT_2 current chapter: Light Years of Gold
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:06PM
Aurora Moon at 7:30AM, Jan. 30, 2008
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mlai
Meh, who cares about men? They're the throwaway gender. You only need 1 man to repopulate the human race.

Um, wow. I hope you were being sarcastic. neither way…you're totally trolling this thread. I actually wanted serious discussion to happen here. =\

Besides, if we used one man to repopulate the human race… wouldn't that make everyone in the whole world related by blood? Then it'd be like everyone would be committing incest if they were to continue the work of that one man. Ew.
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last edited on July 14, 2011 11:10AM
ozoneocean at 7:37AM, Jan. 30, 2008
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Cases of raped males, from the little I know are far more likely to have been raped by another man. I'm sure women can do it, but it's not that simple and they're more likely to be in positions of power and/or offences against children. In any case you're right though, from what little I've read, male rape victims (from male aggressors), tend to be treated quite badly.

As for domestic abuse. Well of course that happens, it isn't that rare. It's much more common against women of course though and tends to be much worse agaisnt them. But yes of course men are victims of that to and from the most of the cases I've read and heard about it tends to involve weaponry of some sort- knives, guns, house hold objects, scissors, even cars,- that may be only because those attacks were severe enough to be reported or told about though.

Male victims, again, don't tend to get the same support… but laws and support systems are based around who is perceived to need help most. Men of all ages are always statistically more likely to be the victims of crime or die violent deaths, from what I've seen, but in cases of abuse they're much more likely to be the aggressor- because men are generally stronger and most cultures emphasise male aggression and female submission…

So, in the end I suppose all that should be done is that victims of either sex should be cared for, treated with sympathy, and their abuse taken seriously, because pain and humiliation doesn't discriminate against gender.
BUT you also have to balance that against the resources available to deal with the greatest number of victims with similar needs.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:29PM
spacehamster at 11:24AM, Jan. 30, 2008
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Well, yeah, but you see, women still make less money than men on average, so this is a non-issue.

(and yes, your sarcasm detector should be smoking right about now)
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:50PM
crazyninny at 1:10PM, Jan. 30, 2008
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How the world is built, men that have been raped and abused will always be tossed aside. Men are looked at to be the agressors, but no one ever thinks that there are guys out there who have been raped and abused in this world.

Will it ever get better? Probably not at this rate.
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:49AM
kyupol at 3:32PM, Jan. 30, 2008
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Gender inequality? There is no such thing. Only nutjubs like kyupol, aurora, and whoever the hell wrote those websites that serve as “proof” are all a bunch of idiots. They are just screaming at the moon idiots that give me the lulz. lol!

If you properly read history, you would see that women have always been oppressed by the patriarchy for 1,000,000,000 years. Since the time of Atlantis and Lemuria, women have been oppressed. Why not the other way around? Why dont we oppress men for 1,000,000,000,000 years as revenge?

Part of that oppressive patriarchy is the conspiracy of the sexist chauvinist pigs to continue to keep females in line and spread their propaganda of misogyny which is very similar to holocaust denying Nazis.

Because all men are violent creatures who start wars and oppress people. Hitler is a man. Stalin is a man. George Bush is a man.
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last edited on July 14, 2011 1:25PM
Priest_Revan at 11:19PM, Jan. 30, 2008
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To be honest, I've thought about this before. I've noticed that when a man hits a woman back when he is on the defensive, he still gets a trouble.

I have actually met a girl before who told me that she believes it about time men hit women back, no matter what. She actually got mad at me and a friend because she hit us both and we didn't hit her back. It was really weird (since I've never been in that kind of situation before).

Personally, I agree with her. I don't care about gender when it comes to hitting someone. If I have to protect myself, I'll punch a b****, k? I mean, I don't care what women do, but if everyone wants equal rights, then to me, everyone will get treated like they are equals. In another words, if I have to punch a man to protect myself, then I'll have to punch a woman to protect myself.

In response to kyupol:

I'm sorry that women didn't get treated fairly for whatever millions of years, but that's just how the animal kingdom worked. I understand humans are different, but naturally, men are technically dominant (yeah, there are some animal species were the female rules, but for much of the animal kingdom, that's not so true)… whether this is true in today's world is, up to debate, but whatever.

But, lets look at this way, I'm happy that women now are taking power. It's about time. I wish I could say the same for every country in the world, but even so…

-end-
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last edited on July 14, 2011 2:49PM
Aurora Moon at 12:54AM, Jan. 31, 2008
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Mali

OK then, why the sudden concern regarding male victims of sexual assault/abuse? Is there a news story I don't know about?

It's not sudden. It's something I was aware of for a long time. Plus over the years I've read news on-line. And from time to time, there would be a male rape news article.

I suppose I just felt like making a thread to discuss this. I was also partly motivated to do so by this article: http://www.abc.net.au/worldtoday/stories/s244535.htm
And this:
http://blogs.smh.com.au/lifestyle/allmenareliars/archives/2007/09/male_rape.html

And also the study that I linked to in my first post that says:
]This is partly a reflection of the lower incidence of male on male rape but it's also why it's been called "the hidden crime"; [b
some experts estimate that for every attack reported to police, 10 more are not.

The National Crime and Safety Survey of 2002 reported that over a 12 month period, the rate for sexual assault for persons aged 18 and over was 0.2 per cent (33,000 victims); 0.4 per cent (28,300) of females and 0.1 per cent (4,800) of males.

Crime stats from the Australian Bureau of Statistics for 2003 record 18,237 victims of sexual assault: 14,892 females (149.8 per 100,000) and 3,255 males (33 per 100,000)

Also the fact that there's actually criminals out there who take advantage of the fact that it's such a taboo subject. those peculiar fiends rape their male victims to keep them from going to the police when breaking into houses, etc. And they actually get away with this!

I just don't think they should be able to get away with such things.
Before, in the past female rape was somewhat taboo to talk about. And because of this, many women suffered in silence. And now we've made progress on that to the point where women aren't as afraid to report the criminals so that they wouldn't be able to get away and to rape others.
And to me, that's a very good thing.

And it just sickens me to see the same things happening all over again with males.

Historically, Male rape was nothing new. There was a lot of male rape in wars, etc… as a way to show their victory over the “losers”. It was even used as a form of punishment in some countries.

Nowadays, most of us are way past that kind of Savage behavior. Or at least I'd like to think so.

But there are still some dangerous people out there who has that kind of primal mentality, of using rape to “dominate” over others or to “punish” others for some perceived wrong-doing. There was even reports of some homophobics brutally raping men with tools or sharp objects as a form of punishment for being gay. Sometimes It wasn't true that the victms were gay, and it was because of a damn rumor that they got treated so badly. But condisering how male victims are so unwilling to report those kinds of crimes, I can't help but wonder how much of it actually goes on.

And because those male victims don't report the crime, those dangerous people are still out on the streets.

Doesn't that trouble you?
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last edited on July 14, 2011 11:10AM
Hawk at 10:43AM, Jan. 31, 2008
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It's kind of funny how the pendulum swings in the case of sexism. I remember reading an interesting story on a gaming site. A female burglar broke into a guy's apartment and stole his gaming console and his games, but the guy happened to be there and discover her in the process. So of course she ran from the apartment, and as the guy caught up and grabbed her arm she screamed “RAPE!”. Suddenly the neighbors came to her aid, swatting and striking at the guy until she was able to break free and escape. I'm sure these neighbors found out that no rape was actually happening, but not before it was too late.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:46PM
StaceyMontgomery at 11:00AM, Jan. 31, 2008
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I dont see that story as all that interesting.

In the same situation, I would react the same way. In fact, I have - several times.

I can recall only a few months ago in Cambridge MA, I was one of several people who responded to cries of help from a young woman. When I got there, she was wrestling with a guy.

You know what? We held him back while she got away. Yeah, he tried to explain that she had stolen from him, or whatever.

Perhaps we got it wrong. Perhaps she was a thief and he was the innocent victim. but even if we got it wrong, I think we made the right call.

And frankly, so did the people in Hawk's story.


last edited on July 14, 2011 3:55PM
Hawk at 1:51PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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And frankly, so did the people in Hawk's story.

So you're saying it was the right decision to automatically assume the girl was the victim and the boy was a rapist? I take issue with that. I'd like to think that people who appear on scene in situations like that should stop any fighting or raping going on, but not let the girl simply run off before any details come forth. After all, if it really is rape, that's the one person most capable of convicting the man and she's leaving the scene of the crime.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:46PM
mlai at 2:06PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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Exactly. What's the guy gonna do, rape a girl with 10 ppl standing there? Nobody leaves until the police arrives.

FIGHT current chapter: Filling In The Gaps
FIGHT_2 current chapter: Light Years of Gold
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:06PM
StaceyMontgomery at 3:12PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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Letting a possible thief go is one thing. Letting a possible attacker go is another thing altogether.

I think that's kind of obvious, isn't it?

So yes, Hawk, I would automatically assume that the girl was the victim and the boy was the Rapist. Because the consequences of being wrong are so different. And what are the odds anyway? Let's see, 1 woman in six is raped by a man. I wonder how many men are actually burgled by women? I'm guessing less than 1 in 6.

The next time I see a man chasing/attacking a woman, I will make that same assumption all over again. It has always turned out to be the right thing, BTW.

I mean, come on people, let's be real.






last edited on July 14, 2011 3:55PM
horseboy at 4:05PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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Well, since no one else has linked to this yet I may as well.

Okay, since Aura wants a serious debate:
I understand how a man can rape another man. Yeah, it's kinda stupid that they won't tell because of it, but homophobia is itself stupid. As they say: “There's no cure for stupidity.” If my neighbour won't tell me that they have a problem, then what right do I have to help them?

Women on men: Okay, unless she was running around with a strap-on on, that brings up the question of “HOW?” Did she attack him first thing in the morning? Slip him some sorta roofiee/viagra cocktail? Most importantly how freaking ugly is she that's she's got to resort to rape?

Abuse: When I moved to the city, yes, I did have a couple of friends get beat up by a girl in front of me. Yes, I did laugh at them for being such a pathetic Nancy. I really shouldn't blame them. After all they are products of their environment. I blame the overly feminizing of little boys. “Goodness me, they run around like little hooligans! Quick medicate them into zombie status.” “What? Two little boys were fighting on the playground? Quick get them to a therapist so they can talk about their feelings. Maybe together we can explore what's wrong with them.” What's wrong with them? It's called testosterone! There is nothing wrong with them. Stop treating them like little Nancies and they won't grow up to be one.

As to hitting back: As a “big guy” it wasn't that uncommon in my 20's to be the target of excessive female aggression attempting to establish dominance over my group. I usually let them have one free non-genitalia aimed attack. (Nut shots go automatically to a level 3 response) Usually it's a verbal waring if they haven't already hurt their hand too much to continue. “Look, I don't hit women, that's uncalled for and unwise to do again.” If they swing again, I throw a hard block. Usually that's enough. For those with more aggression than sense, the third swing will get them in a submission hold until my dominance is assured.
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last edited on July 14, 2011 12:50PM
mlai at 4:21PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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I mean, come on people, let's be real.
No, no, no misdirection please. The correct response was and is, “Nobody leaves until the cops get here.”

I remember when I was in elementary school and I started fighting a girl. She pushed me so I hit her in the back. Now, understand that at that age, she was as big and as strong as me.

I was immediately picked up by the collar, off the ground, by the teacher. He lectured me on the wrongfulness of my action in an extremely threatening tone. Then he tossed me across the room.

No I didn't file complaints. Like Horseboy said, we ain't no nancies. I don't think I ever hit a girl again.

FIGHT current chapter: Filling In The Gaps
FIGHT_2 current chapter: Light Years of Gold
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:06PM
Priest_Revan at 4:51PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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Letting a possible thief go is one thing. Letting a possible attacker go is another thing altogether.

I think that's kind of obvious, isn't it?

So yes, Hawk, I would automatically assume that the girl was the victim and the boy was the Rapist. Because the consequences of being wrong are so different. And what are the odds anyway? Let's see, 1 woman in six is raped by a man. I wonder how many men are actually burgled by women? I'm guessing less than 1 in 6.

The next time I see a man chasing/attacking a woman, I will make that same assumption all over again. It has always turned out to be the right thing, BTW.

I mean, come on people, let's be real.


No, lets not.

Stacy
Perhaps we got it wrong. Perhaps she was a thief and he was the innocent victim. but even if we got it wrong, I think we made the right call.

The right call? So, lets let the female theif get away, but not the male victim. Of course, that makes plenty of sense.
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last edited on July 14, 2011 2:49PM
Rori at 5:07PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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Yeah, I have to agree on the “nobody leaves…” idea.

I think this has a sexist aspect, but the root problem is that we are just really confused about power, sexuality and violence, and it cuts both ways. Now men are finally coming clean about how it cuts them, too. That's a good sign. Would you have heard about that 50, thirty, even 20 years ago? Maybe if the totality of the situation is seen a little more empathy will follow.

last edited on July 14, 2011 3:11PM
ozoneocean at 5:08PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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Well I love myself and my long winded ways so I'll reiterate :)
ozoneocean
Men of all ages are always statistically more likely to be the victims of crime or die violent deaths, from what I've seen, but in cases of abuse they're much more likely to be the aggressor- because men are generally stronger and most cultures emphasise male aggression and female submission…
Ya see the trouble is this is turning out to be a gender war, which is silly because male victims and female victims of crimes are more likely to have suffered from the attack of another male, whether they were robbed, raped or assaulted. That doesn't change the fact that they're still victims of a crime and need some redress, as well as support.
ozoneocean
So, in the end I suppose all that should be done is that victims of either sex should be cared for, treated with sympathy, and their abuse taken seriously, because pain and humiliation doesn't discriminate against gender.BUT you also have to balance that against the resources available to deal with the greatest number of victims with similar needs.
-i.e. rape victims and domestic abuse victims are far more likely to be female, so laws, resources, and training, are tailored with that in mind. It just makes more sense.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:30PM
Hawk at 5:35PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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I mean, come on people, let's be real.

I am being real. I'm saying in both situations (rape and theft), you don't let the woman leave until the police get there, even if she was being raped. To let the woman just leave before you know the details isn't just sexist, it's stupid. Honestly, I'd assume the guy was raping too, but there's this little gear called “justice” that turns in my head, and it would make me find out the full story. The guy isn't always guilty.

I want to know where that “1 in 6 get raped” number comes from, too. Those of us who take stats classes really question numbers like that.

mlai
remember when I was in elementary school and I started fighting a girl. She pushed me so I hit her in the back. Now, understand that at that age, she was as big and as strong as me.

I was immediately picked up by the collar, off the ground, by the teacher. He lectured me on the wrongfulness of my action in an extremely threatening tone. Then he tossed me across the room.

No I didn't file complaints. Like Horseboy said, we ain't no nancies. I don't think I ever hit a girl again.

Man, tell me about it. When I was in the first grade, our recess bell rang and I started walking back to the school. Now, I don't know why she did this, but a girl was running full speed and she ran right into me from behind, knocking me into a chainlink fence. In the process of falling, my hand flew back and hit her in the face, giving her a bloody nose. It took me a minute to even figure out what happened.

She managed to get to a teacher before me, and she told her that I punched her in the face. I was just approaching when I hear the girl say it, and the teacher gave me no chance to explain. Soon I found myself on the fast track to the principal's office. The principal yelled at me for about five minutes straight.

“You think it's okay to hit a girl, huh?!”
“No, I…”
“What's wrong with you? Why did you punch her?”
“I didn't-”
“Don't lie to me! You're going to stay here and think about what you did.”

She made me stay alone in a room at the school's office for the rest of the day and I didn't get lunch either. And when I got home my dad spanked the living crap out of me and kept me in my room without dinner.


It's no stretch for me to imagine this kind of stuff happening in law enforcement and the judicial system. And maybe the sexist idea of the man always being the bad guy stems from the equally sexist idea that women are powerless. I just hope that as we continue to reach equality between the genders, this sense of agressor and victim sorts itself out as well.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:46PM
ozoneocean at 5:51PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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Heh, still doing the gender war thing eh?

Well for children it's different really; until a certain age girls and boys will be about the same size and strength, often many girls are bigger and stronger because they develop faster, and more importantly; neither have developed the intelligence or become indoctrinated into the social niceties that prevent such activities. Adults are stupid by nature (hehe) and apply their OWN adult gender perspectives to childish spats- which only have a 50/50 chance of being correct most of the time since as children either sex is equally likely to be the culprit, even in more conservative, more sexist and less equal parts of the world.

So while THOSE examples are real and numerous, they're unlikely to properly correlate to the adult world. Face it; most male victims will have suffered from the attacks of another male.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:30PM
Rori at 7:07PM, Jan. 31, 2008
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^only the dead know the end of gender war.

It would very important to be there if she were raped, so as to see a doctor immediately, and also have the police report - stronger case that way.

Also, I hate to say it, but those examples are anecdotal. Truth is a lot of people get away with (or get blamed for) various things for various reasons. The key is not to replace one bias with another (from helpless victim to lying bitch), but to confront the bias as to make a decision based on the facts. And that includes admitting when there just isn't enough evidence to punish someone no matter how guilty they look. I know that sucks, but in leu of crazy voodoo mind powers, I can't think of a better way :|
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:11PM
Aurora Moon at 5:47AM, Feb. 1, 2008
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horseboy
Women on men: Okay, unless she was running around with a strap-on on, that brings up the question of “HOW?” Did she attack him first thing in the morning? Slip him some sorta roofiee/viagra cocktail? Most importantly how freaking ugly is she that's she's got to resort to rape?

Man, I hate it when people just don't get that rape is much more than just unwanted sexual perpetration. Rape is defined by many as “forced intercourse”, and is even legally defined that in some states.
Because of this outdated definition, women who was forced to perform oral on men doesn't get justice because such an act gets filed under “Arravanged assault” and the rapists only get 4 years in prison. Now that's stupidity.
Just much like how it's stupid that people don't take male victims seriously because to them it's not “real rape”.

Rape can induce a variety of actions such as forced oral. To get more specific:
The various definitions of rape range from the broad (coercing an individual to engage in any sexual act) to the specific (forcing a woman to submit to sexual intercourse). The United States Code includes the crime of rape under the more comprehensive term “sexual abuse.” Two types of sexual assault are defined in the code: sexual abuse and aggravated sexual abuse. Sexual abuse includes acts in which an individual is forced to engage in sexual activity by use of threats or other fear tactics, or instances in which an individual is physically unable to decline. Aggravated sexual abuse occurs when an individual is forced to submit to sexual acts by use of physical force; threats of death, injury, or kidnapping; or substances that render that individual unconscious or impaired.

There are many ways a woman can force men to do such acts.

like I mentioned up above, I've read many news article on the net about males getting raped in many different variety of ways.

one I remember was the one about a married man. He had been getting drunk at a friend's house party. So he calls his wife and tells her that he'll be home in the morning. And then he goes to sleep it off in his friend's guest room.
There was a woman there, who apparently had her biological clock ticking, and she was feeling the pressure to have a child before it was too late. She was middle-aged, and also reported to have some sort of mental illness too. Anyway, she happened upon this married man lying there out cold.
So she removes his pants and undies, ties him up with bed sheets, and removes her clothes…..Well, you get the idea here.
Anyway, he wakes up to that happening, and is unable to fight her off because he was tied up. He wasn't even able to yell out for help because he had been gagged too.
And she left, and it was an hour before he was discovered. of course He filed rape charges against her, but it was dismissed by the courts for some stupid legal reason.

I'm still trying to find that damn news article about that incident and the follow-ups So you can see how it can really happen.

Besides, you're implying that a woman can't even overpower a man….that's downright sexist. Not all women are frail, helpless, and so on forth. There's female bodybuilders, construction workers, etc. And plus there's ways they can get a man to easily “cooperate”. Guns works as an effective threat, for instance.
“If you don't strip and let me tie you up, you're going to get shot.”

And not all female rapists have to be ugly. Just look at all those female teachers boning male students on the news. Half of them weren't even that bad-looking. in fact, if they wanted, they could had any adult men they wanted.
But noo…. they had to go get advantage of younger boys who didn't know any better.

Face it– anybody who would even entertain the thought of raping anybody, or even to do such an act are usually people with mental problems. It has nothing to do with how ugly or attractive they are.

Take male sex offenders for instance. Some of them were said to be good-looking, respectable and trusted men. Those men could had almost any hot, willing adult women if they wanted. But thanks to their mental illnesses, that wasn't enough for them at all. They had to get their rocks off on having power over somebody helpless–whenever it be an adult woman, or a child.

That's pretty much the same for any female sex offender.
I'm on hitatus while I redo one of my webcomics. Be sure to check it out when I'n done! :)
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:10AM
horseboy at 10:12AM, Feb. 1, 2008
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Aurora Moon
one I remember was the one about a married man. He had been getting drunk at a friend's house party. So he calls his wife and tells her that he'll be home in the morning. And then he goes to sleep it off in his friend's guest room.
There was a woman there, who apparently had her biological clock ticking, and she was feeling the pressure to have a child before it was too late. She was middle-aged, and also reported to have some sort of mental illness too. Anyway, she happened upon this married man lying there out cold.
So she removes his pants and undies, ties him up with bed sheets, and removes her clothes…..Well, you get the idea here.
Anyway, he wakes up to that happening, and is unable to fight her off because he was tied up. He wasn't even able to yell out for help because he had been gagged too.
And she left, and it was an hour before he was discovered. of course He filed rape charges against her, but it was dismissed by the courts for some stupid legal reason.
Wow, usually you've got to pay extra for stuff like that. Of course he filed a rape charge, otherwise his wife would have legal grounds for divorce. Either he “had” to to keep his marriage or he was a whipped Nancy, it's pretty clear.
Besides, you're implying that a woman can't even overpower a man….that's downright sexist. Not all women are frail, helpless, and so on forth. There's female bodybuilders, construction workers, etc. And plus there's ways they can get a man to easily “cooperate”.
Yeah, it's called flashing your tits. I'm not sexist, it's simple genetics. Yes, there are technically women body builders but they're such a statistically small percentage they're “Outside” the statistical curve. You have to “go looking” to find them. In short, they don't count when dealing with broad groups. Of the thousands of women I've met, (note met, not known) there have been 2 that I would constitute a physical threat. One was a farm girl I saw dead lift a 300# guy, the other was a stereotypical bull-dyke truck driver with enough physical prescience to make me take a step back. No, the only sure way for a woman to hurt me is to tell me she loves me.
Guns works as an effective threat, for instance.
“If you don't strip and let me tie you up, you're going to get shot.”
If you choose to live in a place where you're not allowed to defend yourself, what do you expect? *Lives in a “Right to Carry” state*
And not all female rapists have to be ugly. Just look at all those female teachers boning male students on the news. Half of them weren't even that bad-looking. in fact, if they wanted, they could had any adult men they wanted.
But noo…. they had to go get advantage of younger boys who didn't know any better.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MaryKayLetourneauTeachesHere
Face it– anybody who would even entertain the thought of raping anybody, or even to do such an act are usually people with mental problems. It has nothing to do with how ugly or attractive they are.
(Note this statement is just for the sake of debate)Are they? Are they really? I know it's easy for us to want to believe that they are, but how do we know this?
Take male sex offenders for instance. Some of them were said to be good-looking, respectable and trusted men. Those men could had almost any hot, willing adult women if they wanted. But thanks to their mental illnesses, that wasn't enough for them at all. They had to get their rocks off on having power over somebody helpless–whenever it be an adult woman, or a child.
Or it could just be that they're so numb to the games women play that they just don't listen anymore. We don't know they're mentally ill. Rape DOES fall under Rule #36 of the internet. It's not that uncommon a fetish from BOTH SIDES in BOTH GENDERS. Yes, that's a disturbing thought for those of us that don't share that fetish, but do we REALLY need to go down the trail of “this sexual fetish is caused by mentally deranged people”?
That's pretty much the same for any female sex offender.
The difference is the mentality of the “victim.” One of the things you seem to be asking about is “Why is there a lack of empathy for male victoms of Female on male rape.” Well, it's because men have a hard time coming up with a time when a non-ugly, non-related female wants to have sex with you and you don't. Hell, Penthouse Forum has been full of those letters for decades.
There is no such word as “alot”. “A lot” is two words.
Voltaire
Never seek for happiness, it will merely allude the seeker. Never strive for knowledge, it is beyond man's scope. Never think, for in though lies all the ills of mankind. The wise man, like the rat, the crocodile, the fly, merely fulfills his natural function.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:50PM
Aurora Moon at 10:53AM, Feb. 1, 2008
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horseboy
Wow, usually you've got to pay extra for stuff like that. Of course he filed a rape charge, otherwise his wife would have legal grounds for divorce. Either he “had” to to keep his marriage or he was a whipped Nancy, it's pretty clear.

Uhhh…. there was evidence of a struggle, meaning that he definely DID NOT go along with it willingly. Edit: If I remember correctly, the police in the news article also said that they docmented blood on the bedsheets that was used to tie him up. Something about it being a combation of his wrists being tied too tightly and him struggling with all his might to get free.
And also, this was a young guy around 26 years old, who had an morderately attractive wife. While the female rapist was a middle aged woman who was around 39, and she wasn't exactly what you would call a “real looker”. She wasn't ugly, but she wasn't attractive nethier.
Who would he want to have sex with more? You do the math. Plus, there's a saying that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

To you, the middle aged woman could be “The hot older woman”, but to him that same woman could been the “ugly old woman”.

Plus, Why is it so hard for you to believe that some guys are more intersted in staying faithful to their wives than boning every woman they see?

After all, not every guy is a slobbering, horny idiot. To assume that all guys are only intersted in sex with women is just plain stupid.
What about Asexual guys? What about gay guys who aren't intersted in women? The list goes on. Again, that whole “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” thing.

A ugly woman to one guy is another man's hot woman.
I'm on hitatus while I redo one of my webcomics. Be sure to check it out when I'n done! :)
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:10AM
horseboy at 1:39PM, Feb. 1, 2008
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Mainly because of the amount of fridge logic in this story. If it was really important for him to be at his buddy's party, why wasn't she there? If she didn't want to be there that badly, why did he go? If he loved his wife SO much and wasn't Tom Cattin' at the party, when he called, why didn't he ask her to pick him up? When he went into the room with the huge party going on, why didn't he lock the door? If he was so bad he didn't lock his door to let people in and not Tom Cattin' why wasn't his buddy checking in on him every so little often making sure he wasn't unconscious in a pool of his own vomit? There's not enough here to make me believe that this wasn't a case of Beer Goggles+Opportunity becoming anything more than getting caught in sex too kinky for his tolerance level.
There is no such word as “alot”. “A lot” is two words.
Voltaire
Never seek for happiness, it will merely allude the seeker. Never strive for knowledge, it is beyond man's scope. Never think, for in though lies all the ills of mankind. The wise man, like the rat, the crocodile, the fly, merely fulfills his natural function.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:50PM
Aurora Moon at 3:29PM, Feb. 1, 2008
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1. He was drunk. Not too drunk to end up in a pool of his own vomit, but just drunk enough to be unable to drive home. He had the ONLY car outside, and plus it was around 12 AM when it occured. So he was letting his wife know that he had his friend taking care of him and not to worry if he wasn't discovered at home in the morning.

2. It wasn't a imporant party… he was a young guy, who had friends who just got straight out of college. The type of friends who quite hasn't gotten the partying out of their system. It was just a social gathering. As to why his wife wasn't there, I have no idea. Maybe she wasn't the partying type.

3. it was his friend's house, which he had spent the night at so many times before. He proably didn't think anything could happen to him there at all. After all, what macho big guys think that they could get killed, robbed or raped at his friend's house? Plus, you know…DRUNK. Not the best time to be thinking logically.

4. From what I read, The host of the party aka the guy's friend, apparently reminded everyone not to drive home drunk, and to have a designated driver. And also mentioned that if they didn't have a designated driver, that they should stay the night and sleep it off until they felt better to drive home. So the guy wasn't the only one there staying the night. There was a slew of other people sleeping it off as well. But beyond that, everyone was pretty much on their own it seems.

5. And The guy was very clear that he never even gave consent to the woman at all…He just woke up, and there she was, on top of him. For there to be consental sex, both parties would have to be fully conicous and enaging in it from start to fhinsh. haven't you even thought of that? *rolls eyes*
After all, if a woman is “sleeping it off” and then finds some strange man on top of her, that's rape. So how is that any different for when it's the reverse?

6. his friends served as witnesses saying that when they saw him going to bed, that he was alone at the time. There was no sign of that middle-aged woman anywhere close to him, and they also said the two hadn't interacted at all at the party and didn't know each other. The middle-aged woman supposedly came with an younger female. That's all I know.

It just annoys me when I have to type out the whole damn details of an article which I'm straining to remember the details of just because you think the details were too sketchy. (goes back to goggling for the article some more).
I'm on hitatus while I redo one of my webcomics. Be sure to check it out when I'n done! :)
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:10AM
Aurora Moon at 4:31PM, Feb. 1, 2008
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At any rate, I finally found that article. Turns out the woman wasn't middle-aged, it was the guy who was around that age instead. I confused it somewhat with another similar article in which another drunk guy was held in bondage by a elderly woman. ^_^;;
sometimes Time tends to make our minds run two different stories into one if they're similar enough. I hope you'll forgive me for any confusion. But at any rate… it still counts as female on male rape.. and the big point still stands–he was unconscious for most of it.

http://www.aftenposten.no/english/local/article1152684.ece That one isn't as detailed as the one I read ages ago, but it's better than finding nothing.

and a fine example of how female rapists get better treatment than male rapists:
http://myjdrcourtcase.blogspot.com/2007/10/female-rapist-get-pr-bond.html
http://mrsloquacious.blogspot.com/2006/04/injustice-and-female-rapist.html
I'm on hitatus while I redo one of my webcomics. Be sure to check it out when I'n done! :)
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:10AM
Poke Alster at 2:11AM, Feb. 2, 2008
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Alot of people dont think men can get raped because of alot of men always wanting sex so thats why people dont believe them
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:46PM
ozoneocean at 1:46AM, Feb. 3, 2008
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Oh, of course female on male non-consensual sex happens. Not that often though. And unlike what happens to female victims, there's less likelihood of physical injury to the male, due to the greater need for alternative incapacitation and or restraint that doesn't rely on strength alone, as well as the fact that SHE will almost certainly be uh… lubricated sufficiently and so avoid intimate injury to his parts as well- a luxury not always visited upon female victims.
That's in terms of male/female, vaginal sex, but there are many other ways people suffer that are less forgiving.

But, as sex isn't simply a physical act, the way we'd sometimes like to think it is, but also very much a social and mental activity- emotional and mental pain, embarrassment, and a sense of humiliation and intimate violation would still be just as horrible for either gender. I see no reason to make light of that.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:30PM

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