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If you could retool or remake a movie...
meemjar at 12:59PM, Nov. 28, 2010
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What movie have you seen that while you didn't have much of a problem with it, you felt it could've been better in places?
I'll start with a film that had a decent plot but was missing essential ingredients.

DAREDEVIL (2003). A lot of people might hate Ben Affleck in it, but here's how I would have retooled the basic film itself.

I would have kept the basic plot of the film but made these additions:

At the moment that the Kingpin kills Matt's father, Battlin' Jack Murdock in the back alley of the fight arena and Matt is cradling him in his arms, he hears footsteps behind him.
The camera pans up…and its old Stick, the blind Martial Arts master who takes Murdock in and trains him to be the best.
While Matt is there, he meets Sticks other student Elektra Natchios, and they ‘hit it off’.
When Matt leaves Sticks Dojo, Stick confesses that he was there that fateful night because he was pursuing the man who was his greatest student, and greatest failure…Wilson Fisk…the Kingpin…Jack Murdocks murderer.

The film continues unchanged to the point where Matt senses Elektra's entrance into the restaurant. But this time the fight in the playground is ‘getting reacquainted’.

Then when the Kingpin's men arrive back at base, beaten up after an attempt to bring down Daredevil, he angrily wrings the neck of the leader then phones up his lackey to ‘Get me Elektra’.
It turns out that Elektra is working for the Kingpin as a Hit-woman to pay off her fathers debts to him. Unknown to Elektra, the Kingpin also summons Bullseye to serve as back-up. But when she confronts Daredevil and battles him, she discovers its Matt and cannot fulfill the contract.
This disappoints the Kingpin who instructs Bullseye to kill Elektra's father and blame Daredevil.

The movie runs the rest of its course as filmed but with one more difference; instead of Bullseye slapping Elektra around before slitting her throat with the playing card and goring her with her sai, it's the other way around, as in the comics where Elektra was handing Bullseye HIS head, before he resorted to cheating with the card.

One final, sadistic little addition from me; In the epilogue, when Bullseye is in that full body cast in the hospital bed, a doctor is looking at a card with the Inspector and says; “This man has had just about EVERY bone in his body broken.”
The Inspector: “No shit, he fell twenty stories and landed on a car.”
The Doctor: “No, I'm a bone specialist, and I know these bones weren't broken by the impact of a sudden fall. They were broken by having pressure applied to each of them individually.”
The Inspector: “You mean to say that somebody went to town on this guy before he even fell off of the cathedral?”
The Doctor: “Looks like.”



Now, people, its YOUR turn.
Any movies you saw that you marginally enjoyed, but felt they could have stood a retooling?

Now play by the rule. No trolling peoples opinions or input.
Just come up with a movie you saw and state what you felt could have been better in it.

And don't just say; I would retool a movie by making it cease to exist!
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:58PM
Chernobog at 4:23PM, Nov. 28, 2010
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8 Legged Freaks. Basically, make it choose between being either a comedy or a horror, but not mish-mash elements of both. Change that ending credit song to anything else. Also, get rid of David Arquette. He's over the top goofy without being actually funny.
 
 
“You tell yourself to just
enjoy the process,” he added. “That whether you succeed or fail, win or
lose, it will be fine. You pretend to be Zen. You adopt detachment, and
ironic humor, while secretly praying for a miracle.”
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:41AM
ayesinback at 7:46AM, Nov. 29, 2010
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meemjar
What movie have you seen that while you didn't have much of a problem with it, you felt it could've been better in places?
I Love this movie, but for being a fantastic movie, MP&The Holy Grail has THE Lamest ending.

I know they ran out of money when making it, but I think if everyone just fell into a hole at the end it would have been better.
under new management
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:14AM
Faliat at 8:21AM, Nov. 29, 2010
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If I'd been in charge of Oliver, I would've changed the positioning of the last two scenes (Fagin and Dodger marching off into the sunset with one of my favourite “villain” songs playing inthe background would've made a better ending) and found a kid that could sing to play the titular character. My mum can't watch it anymore knowing that kid's just mouthing along.

It's one of her favourite movies and even she agrees with the ending switch I mentioned before.

Call that jumped up metal rod a knife?
Watch mine go straight through a kevlar table, and if it dunt do the same to a certain gaixan's skull in my immediate vicinity after, I GET A F*****G REFUND! BUKKO, AH?!

- Rekkiy (NerveWire)
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:25PM
isukun at 11:02AM, Nov. 29, 2010
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Little Shop of Horrors, the later Rick Moranis version. I probably wouldn't remake the whole film, though, just clean up the rough footage of the original ending and put it back in the film instead of the rushed “happy ending” they threw in because test audiences are idiots.

Not really a movie, but I have thought of approaching the BBC with the idea of remaking the original 26 seasons of Doctor Who using the old audio scores (remastered in 5.1 with some added flair) and CG animation (using character likenesses, but having a more stylized look like Clone Wars) to update the visuals and create watchable versions of the lost episodes. If nothing else, it would drive DVD sales and make it possible for American audiences who didn't get a chance to watch the earlier seasons to get acclimated with the series.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:05PM
blindsk at 11:52AM, Nov. 29, 2010
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The movies that come to mind for me are generally ones that make a serious attempt at being epic. There aren't any specific scenes that kill the mood or anything - it's the entire thing that seems like the wrong approach.

For instance, The Matrix series, specifically the last two. After the first one, which I find completely fine in its own right, the two sequels never held up to the inventive feel I had come to anticipate. The dialogue seemed contrived, many of the plot points seemed dull or unnecessary, and I felt underwhelmed the entire time. And it had so much more potential. The Matrix series could've focused more on character development, maybe even the whole virus concept, or dove more into the idea of a supercomputer controlling everything. Even the protagonist's purpose seemed a bit weak in how they executed it. Really, it was just weak on all of those aforementioned points.

Also, Transformers. Less about the humans, more about the robots.
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:25AM
Hawk at 1:40PM, Nov. 29, 2010
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isukun
Little Shop of Horrors, the later Rick Moranis version. I probably wouldn't remake the whole film, though, just clean up the rough footage of the original ending and put it back in the film instead of the rushed “happy ending” they threw in because test audiences are idiots.

I didn't even know Little Shop of Horrors had an alternate ending. That was a childhood favorite of mine. Is the original ending available as a deleted scene on the DVD?
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:47PM
isukun at 7:29PM, Nov. 29, 2010
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Unfortunately, no. The first release of the DVD had it and then it got recalled and they pulled it off due to some licensing nonsense. The original ending wasn't as happy and followed the stageplay. You can find the rough B&W cut on youtube, but that's about the best you're going to get.

I have to agree with the Matrix sequels being sub par. I think mostly what hurt that series was that the first film wasn't supposed to have a sequel. If they had just left good enough alone, that movie would be remembered as a classic instead of as a mediocre trilogy. It was kind of stupid to pick up where they did as the first film had a pretty conclusive ending with the implication being that Neo shut down the Matrix in the end. Then they decided to milk the franchise for everything it was worth with side stories and two sequels that not only opened the story back up, negating the ending from the first film, they didn't even resolve the story in the end, instead trying to get people to buy into the MMO to see where it all went from there.

It's the perfect example of what happens when an up-and-coming director puts out a good movie with a reasonable budget and then ruins the franchise by dumping money into it and trying to add everything they couldn't in the original. Sometimes it's better to have boundaries. It forces you to focus on particular elements.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:05PM
ozoneocean at 8:19PM, Nov. 29, 2010
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isukun
It's the perfect example of what happens when an up-and-coming director puts out a good movie with a reasonable budget and then ruins the franchise by dumping money into it and trying to add everything they couldn't in the original.
Not just the directors: The producers and the studios wanting to milk a proved property for all they think they can get from it.

—————
Tank Girl.

There's so much that could be done with that one…
-You could remake the whole thing along the lines of the groovy animation shorts it had within it.
-You could just re-do the live action, but with a more funky, crazy, amoral, cruel story, just like the tone of the comics- with Tankgirl as the prime villain AND hero. The thing about the comics is that NO ONE is as evil and nasty as she is.
-Or you could re-cut it a bit… They didn't even include the deleted scenes in the DVD, the only place you can see them is online, but it made more sense with the ending where it rains. Everything was leading up to that and it resolved the Subgirl subplot. The animation that they used to finish it off was nice but not a good conclusion, that really should've played after the credits instead.
I would've also included an extended version of the “bees do it” Busby Berkeley style musical scene. That was THE best part of the whole film and was ruined by being cut away from and then ending short. you DO NOT cut away from a beautifully choreographed dance and musical sequence featuring heaps of extras! That's art and hundreds of thousands of dollars down the fricken drain!

I would've also recast Jetgirl. Niomi Watts is an acclaimed actor now but she wasn't the right person for a movie like Tank Girl. She was incompetent and inadequate, even Ice T put in a much better performance than her.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:37PM
bravo1102 at 1:46AM, Nov. 30, 2010
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Have to agree about Matrix and Tank Girl.

If you want to see the original ending of Little Shop watch the original Roger Corman movie. The Broadway musical follows the original movie there.

For the most part though I just can't second guess the creative or non-creative efforts of movie-makers anymore. After watching the extras on the DVDs a lot of times the movie-makers are stuck with compromises. That's how I can forgive Holy Grail. I listened and read all the making of stuff and it really is the best they could do had with what they had.

I think there should be a universal board of story definitiveness. When the definitive version of a story is done NO OTHER FILM VERSION IS ALLOWED UNDER PAIN OF DEATH.

last edited on July 14, 2011 11:34AM
ozoneocean at 4:19AM, Nov. 30, 2010
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bravo1102
When the definitive version of a story is done NO OTHER FILM VERSION IS ALLOWED UNDER PAIN OF DEATH.
agreed.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:37PM
Genejoke at 5:09AM, Nov. 30, 2010
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Blade runner.

It is a nice idea ruined by hideous design poor pacing and a rubbish score.

If Michael Bay or Joel Schumaker were to remake it and add some action and explosions. Some dramatic chases with flying cars and some hi techgadgets like the (definitive) roger moore era bond films.

Would also need a good cast someone really talented and charismatic for deckard, someone like orlando bloom or if you want a sexy young deckard maybe zac efron.

Roy batty would need a name change too, silly name he should be called something like delta 90210, he is a replicant after all. He should be played by someone cool too, perhaps curtis (50 cent) jackson.

He could do the score too, ad a bit of class to it.

Oh and get rid of the nonsense about deckard being a replicant
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:33PM
Genejoke at 5:17AM, Nov. 30, 2010
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Joking aside though.

Johnny mnemonic.


That has a pretty cool idea but the execution was terrible.

Keanu Reeves fit the role but a bit old now, there isn't anythiog fundamentally wrong with the story but there was far too little of dolph lundgrens character who was the best thing in the original. Some tightening of the script and better production and direction and it could stand alongside things like ghost in the shell quite proudly.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:33PM
ozoneocean at 5:19AM, Nov. 30, 2010
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Genejoke
Blade runner.

It is a nice idea ruined by hideous design poor pacing and a rubbish score.

If Michael Bay or Joel Schumaker were to remake it and add some action and explosions. Some dramatic chases with flying cars and some hi techgadgets like the (definitive) roger moore era bond films.

Would also need a good cast someone really talented and charismatic for deckard, someone like orlando bloom or if you want a sexy young deckard maybe zac efron.

Roy batty would need a name change too, silly name he should be called something like delta 90210, he is a replicant after all. He should be played by someone cool too, perhaps curtis (50 cent) jackson.

He could do the score too, ad a bit of class to it.

Oh and get rid of the nonsense about deckard being a replicant
Yes, yes, and YES!

Plus, for all the sexy girl rolls they should audition the cast using a TV show like X-factor or “insert-country-name-here's” Got Talent.

The replecants are too old in the original. In fact most of the cast was. They need more teens in it. Or early 20ish people playing teens!
That's it- all the replicants should be teens in their senior year, and Deckard should be a woman.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:37PM
Abt_Nihil at 10:22AM, Nov. 30, 2010
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blindsk
Also, Transformers. Less about the humans, more about the robots.
I would have mentioned that too, but there was just too much wrong with the second. By my calculations, making it a better film would mean cutting out 92.73%. Most of what would remain would be Optimus Prime being bad-ass.
last edited on July 14, 2011 10:44AM
Genejoke at 10:50AM, Nov. 30, 2010
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and if you cut racism and dick jokes out you have a five minute clip of optimus being bad ass.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:33PM
meemjar at 12:48PM, Nov. 30, 2010
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“No other film version is allowed under pain of death!”

Too bad cause the next retooling might be considered something of a blasphemy…but some would probably agree with it:

STAR WARS the prequel Trilogy.

This is the steps I would take;

#1) Eliminate the Phantom menace altogether. I would start with Episode 2 and rename it “Twilight of the Republic” (Another fan suggested that title). And therefore Anakin and Padme meet for the first time on Coruscant. And as Anakin is escorting Padme back to Naboo he relates the tale of how he was found on Tatooine by Obi Wan and Qui Gon. They were pursuing a Sith renegade (Darth Maul) when they found him and purchased him from Watoo.
As they head for the Jedi ship, they are ambushed by Darth Maul who Mortally wounds Qui Gon but to Obi Wan's surprise Anakin takes control of the ship and blasts at Maul with the guns driving him off. Hence in the moment in ‘Return of the Jedi’ when Obi says, “When I met your father he was already a great pilot…”

The dying Qui Gon makes Obi Wan promise to train the boy and at Coruscant, after some misgivings, the council consents. We come back to the present and the movie runs it's course with the addition that Maul would be assisting Dooku.

The upswing; I eliminate Jar Jar Binks, the Pod races and Anakin single-handedly destroying the Federation mother ship from memory.
The downswing is Qui Gon dies sooner, but I would have him re-appear in Ghost form throughout the trilogy.

#2) The second film would be a live-action version of ‘The Clone Wars.’
It would be very Episodic as the short stories would cover numerous battles across the galaxy, but it would gain us some insight of the other Jedi.
I would lift the beginning of ‘Revenge of the Sith to serve as the climax and after Dooku is dispatched and General Grievous escapes Padme approaches Anakin and tells him she’s pregnant. End of Movie.

#3) The third film would run its course except now at the time Anakin turns to become Darth Vader the movie will time-lapse a ten year period where he hunts down the surviving Jedi with the aid of a young Boba Fett towards the end.
In one moment Fett fries a Jedi that Vader wanted alive and chastises him; “NEXT time I want him ALIVE! NO DISINTEGRATIONS!”
“As you wish.” Fett replies.
Meanwhile Padme has had her twins, sent them away, and went into hiding to formulate the rebellion. She takes a new alias; Mon Mothma.
Then in the climax on the fire world of Mustafar Obi Wan and Padme are rescuing a slave colony of Wookies (Among them a human, a young Han Solo) when Vader arrives.
As Padme, Han and Chewbacca lead the escape, Obi Wan and Vader have their show-down. Padme watches helplessly as Anakin rolls into the lava and Obi Wan pulls her away.

The epilogues go as follows;
1) We see the newly constructed Vader standing with Palpatine on the observation deck of their ship watching the Death Star being constructed.
2) We see Mon Calamari ships flying into the reaches of space while Padme gazes sadly out into the stars.
3) On Alderaan we see the ten-year-old Leia getting riding lessons from her father.
4) We see Obi Wan visiting the Lars homestead and sees ten-year-old Luke, gazing off into the sky striking that familiar pose. End of part three.

Now THAT I know was a massive retooling, but who agrees that Episodes 1-3 were NOT up to snuff to the original trilogy?
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:58PM
ayesinback at 3:08PM, Nov. 30, 2010
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The STAR WARS prequels sucked.
under new management
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:14AM
Faliat at 6:26PM, Nov. 30, 2010
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I actually liked the third one more than the original trilogy.
And that's because I generally hate them all.

I get a lot of flack for that. I don't care. Say it's an old series and that they were great for their time.

But truly GOOD movies stand the test of time.

Go watch “A Clockwork Orange”, go watch “Jurassic Park”, go watch “Psycho”.

You can watch any of these movies and not care what time period it was made in. They're all still as good now as they were when they first came out.

Call that jumped up metal rod a knife?
Watch mine go straight through a kevlar table, and if it dunt do the same to a certain gaixan's skull in my immediate vicinity after, I GET A F*****G REFUND! BUKKO, AH?!

- Rekkiy (NerveWire)
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:25PM
ozoneocean at 7:51PM, Nov. 30, 2010
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Faliat
Go watch “A Clockwork Orange”, go watch “Jurassic Park”, go watch “Psycho”.
I disagree on Jurassic and Clockwork. I thought Jurassic was lame when I first saw it, shortly after it came out.

Clockwork is… a bit silly. All the acting is pretty terrible. Malcolm McDowell played it pretty cartoony.
Whereas I think all the original Starwars films are eternal classics :)

Sooo… just goes to show that tastes differ ^_^



My retooling of the new Starwars films would be to not make them at all.

——————–

Re-tooling of Conan the Destroyer-
-Put more clothes on Arnold. He can still show himself off in some scenes, but for most of the film he should at least wear trousers! Too much musclyness all the time looks stupid.
-Use the same director as the first film. John Milius was a crazy gun-toting military fetishists, but he knew the subject-matter and he knew how to make a great film with it! Richard Fleischer should've stuck to Disney films.
-Less stupid comedy bits. They weren't bad, but there was too much.
-Less supernatural crap. Effects aren't as good as flesh and blood, Conan looked better fighting real people than silly monsters.
-Get rid of the innocent young girl.
-Conan's band should be equals, not Conan as the leader/dad character with the rest as bickering children.
-Get rid of Malik. Don't need a comedy relief character.

Fixed.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:37PM
Mr Kaos at 11:53AM, Dec. 1, 2010
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Hmm..
Transformers both movies.
1. Remove the good for nothing human characters. I want Transformers. Not horny teenagers.
2. barfing, farting and lame jokes are going to be removed completly. Seriously.. a old transformer who coughes and farts? it is.. so lame. Even he is old. he still should be fine.
3. hire better writers. the plot in both movies were pretty weak. mostly in the second movie.
4. should have started in the volcano where the transformers have been sleeping for 1 million years.
5. Megaton's design… should be like the orginal or at least close to it.
6. the cube should be IN Prime not outside him. which would make the fights more interessing.

that is what i got.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:07PM
DAJB at 3:23PM, Dec. 1, 2010
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Mr Kaos
Transformers both movies.
1. Remove the good for nothing human characters.
Heh. I'd have gone the other way. I thought the first movie wasn't too bad until those corny robots showed up. I'd scrap those and keep the humans! Oh, and for the second movie, I'd scrap both the robots and the humans!

meemjar
DAREDEVIL (2003). A lot of people might hate Ben Affleck in it
I liked most of Daredevil and had no problem with Ben Affleck in it. In fact, I thought he was pretty good. There were two scenes I'd have cut though:
1. The awful sex-in-front-of-the-open-fire scene (such a cliche!) Actually, that was cut from the Director's Cut and so I suppose that's only half a change!
2. The fight on the see-saw. (You're supposed to be blind, you idiot! Do the words “secret identity” mean nothing to you?!)
Oh, and I'd have given a bigger part to Foggy. Jon Favreau is so under-rated!

********************

Now, my picks: Tim Burton's Batman and Batman Returns!
For the most part, I love both movies but there are several scenes I absolutely hate!

In Batman, Jack Nicholson is so cool when he's being evil and, well, just generally psychotic. But the art gallery scene? And the balloons? Ugh! I know what Burton was trying to do but they just jar with the rest of the film, completely breaking the atmosphere. It's as if someone had taken a clip from an Adam West episode and dropped it into the middle!

The same thing goes for Batman Returns. Danny DeVito's Penguin is quite chilling at times but that duck he rides around on? And the silly kiddie-ride he uses to control the Batmobile? And the fact that his master plan involves strapping rockets to radio-controlled penguins?! It's like the film keeps slipping in and out of an episode of The Brave and the Bold!

Now, how to re-tool them? Well, that's easy 'cos Christopher Nolan has already done it!

last edited on July 14, 2011 12:04PM
ozoneocean at 6:44PM, Dec. 1, 2010
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Hahaha, DAJB, YOU are Hollywood's mythical target audience. The Holy Grail! :)

I always wondered who it was most films were aimed at… ^_^

————–
New idea for a thread, based on Genejoke's joke- how to ruin a movie through a retool.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:37PM
bravo1102 at 8:15PM, Dec. 1, 2010
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meemjar
“No other film version is allowed under pain of death!”

Too bad cause the next retooling might be considered something of a blasphemy…but some would probably agree with it:

Now THAT I know was a massive retooling, but who agrees that Episodes 1-3 were NOT up to snuff to the original trilogy?

That was a good rethinking of episodes 1-3. That's a redo that should be done under pain of death. Maybe once Dreamworks perfects time travel Lucas can go back and unmake the prequels.

—-

The Patriot.

My favorite movie to hate. How about this tell the true story of some British young super hot shit arrogant cavalryman (Banastre Tarleton), an old timer rifleman soldier (Daniel Morgan) , the wily but overweight cavalryman cousin of the greatest man in the nation (Colonel Washington of the Continental Dragoons), against the background of a true brillant chess game of manuever between two generals (Cornwallis and the genius of Nathanial Greene who never won a battle but destroyed an entire army)

Additionally we'd have two partisans the cranky realist (Thomas Sumter) and a dashing smart guy (Francis Marion) against the hot shit arrogant cavalryman who finally gets his come-uppance at the hands of the old timer soldier in a battle in the Cowpens with the wily cavalryman and dashing partisan in knock-down drag-out sword fights with the British and Loyalists.

The Frenchman would be replaced with a sot and his uncontrollable band of renegades. (Armaud's Legion)

No burning chruches and the British cavalryman's soldiers would all be protrayed as Loyalists like they really were making the true first Civil War the American Revolution in the south was. In other words just tell the true story.

The British Loyalists would have their green uniforms, the British cavalry would have their Skull and Crossbone marked helmets, and we'd discover that British regiments had other facing colors than blue!

Just tell what really happened, no one would ever believe it.

last edited on July 14, 2011 11:34AM
Abt_Nihil at 3:35AM, Dec. 2, 2010
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Mr Kaos
5. Megaton's design… should be like the orginal or at least close to it.
This has been said by a lot of TF G1 fans. But… just because it's the original doesn't mean it's good. In fact, I always thought the original Megatron looked like the tin man from Wizard of Oz. Plus, he had that annoying, pretentious villain voice. (And I know a lot of TF fans will hate me for saying this :P) I thought the Megatron design from the movies was great, and Hugo Weaving's voice was brilliant.

DAJB
Mr Kaos
Transformers both movies.
1. Remove the good for nothing human characters.
Heh. I'd have gone the other way. I thought the first movie wasn't too bad until those corny robots showed up. I'd scrap those and keep the humans! Oh, and for the second movie, I'd scrap both the robots and the humans!
Again, I'll have to play devil's advocate. I thought the first movie was balanced in an okay way. The long “boy and his first car” plot set up the whole thing nicely. I like long intros that build up the excitement. Like in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon or Hulk (both directed by Ang Lee, who is a great story-teller – and I certainly don't want to discuss whether his Hulk was good or not. Least of all, I want to discuss the mutant poodle scene! :P I know a lot of people hate that movie, but I still think it's one of the best comic adaptations out there).

DAJB
In Batman, Jack Nicholson is so cool when he's being evil and, well, just generally psychotic. But the art gallery scene? And the balloons? Ugh! I know what Burton was trying to do but they just jar with the rest of the film, completely breaking the atmosphere. It's as if someone had taken a clip from an Adam West episode and dropped it into the middle!

The same thing goes for Batman Returns. Danny DeVito's Penguin is quite chilling at times but that duck he rides around on? And the silly kiddie-ride he uses to control the Batmobile? And the fact that his master plan involves strapping rockets to radio-controlled penguins?! It's like the film keeps slipping in and out of an episode of The Brave and the Bold!

Now, how to re-tool them? Well, that's easy 'cos Christopher Nolan has already done it!
I don't think I've ever disagreed with you to such a dramatic extent :P
I can see your points about the first Batman, but I don't find them particularly wrong. The one thing about the art gallery scene that was definitely wrong was the Prince song playing in the background! :P
But IMHO Batman Returns is vastly superior to the Nolan Batman movies. The nightmarish quality of it greatly depends on Burton's use of archetypal stuff from our collective childhood, including the duck, the “silly kiddie-ride” and the rocket-controlled penguins (okay, those weren't part of my childhood). They are mainly about characters whose childhood was ruined in one way or another, so they live it out in a bitter, cynical way.
The Nolan movies are pseudo-realistic interpretations of the Batman-verse, and they don't mean to say anything beyond what they depict. At their best (= The Dark Knight), they succeed in pretending that the Bat-verse is real and believable. Burton's movies don't even try to pretend.
last edited on July 14, 2011 10:44AM
ozoneocean at 3:50AM, Dec. 2, 2010
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Abt_Nihil
DAJB
Batman
Now, how to re-tool them? Well, that's easy 'cos Christopher Nolan has already done it!
I don't think I've ever disagreed with you to such a dramatic extent :P
I can see your points about the first Batman, but I don't find them particularly wrong. The one thing about the art gallery scene that was definitely wrong was the Prince song playing in the background! :P
But IMHO Batman Returns is vastly superior to the Nolan Batman movies. The nightmarish quality of it greatly depends on Burton's use of archetypal stuff from our collective childhood, including the duck, the “silly kiddie-ride” and the rocket-controlled penguins (okay, those weren't part of my childhood). They are mainly about characters whose childhood was ruined in one way or another, so they live it out in a bitter, cynical way.
The Nolan movies are pseudo-realistic interpretations of the Batman-verse, and they don't mean to say anything beyond what they depict. At their best (= The Dark Knight), they succeed in pretending that the Bat-verse is real and believable. Burton's movies don't even try to pretend.
I don't think I've ever agreed with you to such a dramatic extent :)
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:37PM
Abt_Nihil at 8:26AM, Dec. 2, 2010
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ozoneocean
I don't think I've ever agreed with you to such a dramatic extent :)
Seems like great minds don't think alike all the time, but it's bound to happen sooner or later! ^_^
last edited on July 14, 2011 10:44AM
skoolmunkee at 4:30PM, Dec. 2, 2010
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posts: 7,058
joined: 1-2-2006
meemjar
What movie have you seen that while you didn't have much of a problem with it, you felt it could've been better in places?

Well, the movie I'd want to remake I DID have a lot of problems with (which is why I'd want to remake it). That movie is Hellboy 2. :]

I can generally separate movies away from their source material, and I thought Hellboy 1 was pretty decent. The second one made me angry though. It would have been easier if the movie was total garbage, but there were actually amazing effects, creepy monsters, a couple really lovely moments, and on the surface a very cool plot. Where it all fell apart was the character writing and lame dialogue and where the movie was trying to be meaningful. Hellboy, I'm pregnant, you're gonna be a dad? Really?

Just turn it into a straight-up monster movie with straight-up capable good guys and bad guys. Also get rid of those stupid elves, elves aren't cool any more.
  IT'S OLD BATMAN
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:44PM
Genejoke at 2:08AM, Dec. 3, 2010
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joined: 4-9-2010
Chronicles of Riddick

Take out the fantasy plot. desexy “jack” and have a decent action sci fi movie. The stuff with bounty hunters and the prison was pretty good aside from cheesy dialogue. Work that aspect better, cast someone far more imposiing as tombs and voila.

Keeop Karl Urban but as a bounty hunter or something.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:33PM
Abt_Nihil at 4:50AM, Dec. 3, 2010
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posts: 1,213
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skoolmunkee
Hellboy 2
I agree 100% :D
last edited on July 14, 2011 10:44AM

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