Debate and Discussion

IS SPANKING OKAY
Vindibudd at 10:21AM, June 30, 2007
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Spanking is fine when done correctly and by that I mean like this:

Kid runs into the street after being told not to run in the street.

Parent takes kid and says, that they are going to get a spanking because:

You disobeyed Mommy/Daddy and ran into the street.

Do you understand what you are getting spanked for?

And a few swift swats to the bottom.

Are you going to run into the street again?

No.

Good, now go back to playing


A lot of people just scream at their kids and hit them because they are pissed off.

That is NOT spanking, that is abuse. There is a difference, people. Those who would say that spanking teaches violence, well not proper spanking. Proper spanking teaches that there are consequences for doing something that is wrong. Your kid might not get hit by a car THAT time they run into the street. And if there are no consequences, then they may do it again and then they get killed. You discipline children so they don't get disciplined by things that can really hurt them. A spanking is not going to hurt your kid. Getting thrown in prison for not playing by society's rules will. Getting hit by a car will also.
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:42PM
marine at 10:36AM, June 30, 2007
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Vindibudd
Spanking is fine when done correctly and by that I mean like this:

Kid runs into the street after being told not to run in the street.

Parent takes kid and says, that they are going to get a spanking because:

You disobeyed Mommy/Daddy and ran into the street.

Do you understand what you are getting spanked for?

And a few swift swats to the bottom.

Are you going to run into the street again?

No.

Good, now go back to playing


A lot of people just scream at their kids and hit them because they are pissed off.

That is NOT spanking, that is abuse. There is a difference, people. Those who would say that spanking teaches violence, well not proper spanking. Proper spanking teaches that there are consequences for doing something that is wrong. Your kid might not get hit by a car THAT time they run into the street. And if there are no consequences, then they may do it again and then they get killed. You discipline children so they don't get disciplined by things that can really hurt them. A spanking is not going to hurt your kid. Getting thrown in prison for not playing by society's rules will. Getting hit by a car will also.

Thats a lot like my argument for spanking, kids don't listen. Some kids who put their hands on a hot stove stop after being burned or told not to touch it. Some kids are stupid and contiously touch a stove when told not to a thousand times. Time out just isn't that good a punishment. “go to your room” doesn't work anymore, most kids spend all day in their rooms with their ipods and video games. So what can you do?
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:52PM
kyupol at 1:47PM, June 30, 2007
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Too many kids out there acting so spoiled… think they are so tough… too much self-esteem overdose.

Just sickening.

If they were spanked when they were younger, their self-esteem wont be overblown.

Too much of something is bad.

Be it too much spanking or too much self-esteem.


Therefore… Spanking = regulator of self-esteem in children.



Everyone needs a little humiliation and pain in their lives.
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last edited on July 14, 2011 1:25PM
subcultured at 4:03PM, June 30, 2007
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i'm sure a depress kid that becomes suicidal because of too much humiliation (which spanking is part of) is a better alternative.

why not instead of humiliating the kid, help them understand what they did wrong.
J
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:02PM
Memmy at 4:58PM, June 30, 2007
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Well, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. However, kids do change over time as they grow up. Often, good parents know their childrens and is able to excute appropriate punishment if their children do something wrong.

In my opinion. Poor parenting means parents who dont do a good job of discipling their childrens or teaching them good values and morals(whatever that may be). It can be either too little displines or excessive that is child abuse.

The point here, spanking is NOT bad if its done correctly. If its over done or done out of anger, its abuse.

subcultured
i'm sure a depress kid that becomes suicidal because of too much humiliation (which spanking is part of) is a better alternative.

why not instead of humiliating the kid, help them understand what they did wrong.

Thats a good idea, but we need to remember that disciplines doesnt mean one method. You can spank, you can ground a kid, you can impose a rule that if a child do something wrong, they have to make up for it, You can sit down with them and discuss why what they did was wrong and why they're being punished etc, etc.

Just my thoughts.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:59PM
subcultured at 5:12PM, June 30, 2007
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Memmy
You seem to be implying (no offense) that what parents do is always spanking or humilations.

i didn't imply that at all
J
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:02PM
Memmy at 5:18PM, June 30, 2007
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Memmy
You seem to be implying (no offense) that what parents do is always spanking or humilations.

i didn't imply that at all

Sorry, you caught me in middle of me editing number of times. I have a habit of doing that. I didnt mean for you to catch my earlier thoughts. :nervous: But anyway! Please re-read. :)
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:59PM
Puff at 8:54AM, July 1, 2007
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I got spanked as a kid, and you know what it did to me? It made me stop doing bad stuff so my butt wouldn't get slapped raw. I don't think verbal punishments ever EVER work. The child says “Oh Mom and Dad are nagging at me, I'll pretend to pay attention while they nag, and being that it has no immediate effect on me, I'll go do it again tomorrow!”. Sending a kid to time out isn't going to do anything either, especially if the kid doesn't mind sitting still. Spankings are a solid punishment, and the kid knows where he stands when he gets spanked. Now, if you're back-handing your child, punching him in the stomach, or hitting him with an object (Yeah I never thought the wooden spoon thing as cool) that's not right, and that's NOT spanking.

A good spank in public to teach your kid to behave is no big deal in my opinion either. If you got your pants pulled down in front of people and smacked on the butt, you'd learn that your mother/father was the boss, and not disobey them again, especially in front of other people. If you embarass your parents in public, I think they have the right to embarass you. Parents are too ‘squishy’ nowadays. They let their children be the boss of them instead of the other way around.
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last edited on July 14, 2011 2:54PM
dgriff13 at 12:17PM, July 1, 2007
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Interesting discussion! I'll add my 2 cents.

I was spanked as a kid, we're talking early eighties, here. But it was a last resort- I knew if it came down to a spanking, I must have been REALLY bad, and was told over and over to stop whatever it was that I was doing. It was never a “lazy parenting” type of thing, because I never got a spanking as a first reaction.. I must have been pressing my parent's buttons for a long time, LOL.

Somewhere between when I was born and my sister was born, my parents decided spanking was bad, and my sister rarely if ever got a hand-to-the-rear. From my perspective, A LOT changed in how my parents raised me and how they raised my sister. Could be a youngest-oldest thing, tho. The oldest kid always thinks the youngest gets whatever they want, am I wrong? LOL

Anyhoo, I think I turned out well, I'm not a victim of “abuse” and still have a good relationship with both my parents. I don't remember fearing either of my parents more because they spanked me. I don't remember the spanking itself hurting all that much, it was more the fact that I was bad enough to BE spanked and how angry my parents were at the time. Actually, it's quite interesting what actually works on a kid. My mom was the screamer, more often than not she used volume to try to shut me up and instill respect (and in reality, her volume annoyed me more than anything else, and made me want to scream and yell right back at her… THAT never ended well). My dad on the other hand rarely yelled or spanked me. He's a soft-spoken man… he'd say a couple words to me, and those words would burn a hole in me deeper than any spanking or any yelling in my ear, ever could. I responded best (and still do) to clam, mature, intelligent advice and discussion… compromise…. or even a flat-out line like, “I can't believe you did that… such a brainless act… I never thought my daughter would do something so dumb…”. OUCH. Way more painful than a smack on the rear.

Also, a funny story: a past coworker of mine only spanked her child once. Her 5-year-old daughter wouldn't go to bed… she kept asking for her favorite stuffed rabbit “bun-bun”. Mom didn't care, just wanted her to go to bed already. The tantrum ensued, and mom gave her a quick smack on the behind. The girl stopped crying immediately, stood up, looked mom straight in the eye and said calmly, “I'm not going to bed.. until I get my Bun-Bun.” Mom, in shock, found “bun-bun”, handed it to her daughter, and right off to bed she went, no crying, no stomping, no problems at all. I have no idea if the spanking worked, or didn't work in that scenario, but I find the story f'n hilarious. Mom vowed to never spank her again.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:10PM
monsterfriend at 12:32PM, July 2, 2007
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Puff
I got spanked as a kid, and you know what it did to me? It made me stop doing bad stuff so my butt wouldn't get slapped raw. I don't think verbal punishments ever EVER work. The child says “Oh Mom and Dad are nagging at me, I'll pretend to pay attention while they nag, and being that it has no immediate effect on me, I'll go do it again tomorrow!”. Sending a kid to time out isn't going to do anything either, especially if the kid doesn't mind sitting still. Spankings are a solid punishment, and the kid knows where he stands when he gets spanked. Now, if you're back-handing your child, punching him in the stomach, or hitting him with an object (Yeah I never thought the wooden spoon thing as cool) that's not right, and that's NOT spanking.

A good spank in public to teach your kid to behave is no big deal in my opinion either. If you got your pants pulled down in front of people and smacked on the butt, you'd learn that your mother/father was the boss, and not disobey them again, especially in front of other people. If you embarass your parents in public, I think they have the right to embarass you. Parents are too ‘squishy’ nowadays. They let their children be the boss of them instead of the other way around.

good spanking okay but cutting or something like that not right i had to get on my nees wich hurt because we had rocks in the corner
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last edited on July 14, 2011 2:07PM
monsterfriend at 12:34PM, July 2, 2007
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dgriff13
Interesting discussion! I'll add my 2 cents.

I was spanked as a kid, we're talking early eighties, here. But it was a last resort- I knew if it came down to a spanking, I must have been REALLY bad, and was told over and over to stop whatever it was that I was doing. It was never a “lazy parenting” type of thing, because I never got a spanking as a first reaction.. I must have been pressing my parent's buttons for a long time, LOL.

Somewhere between when I was born and my sister was born, my parents decided spanking was bad, and my sister rarely if ever got a hand-to-the-rear. From my perspective, A LOT changed in how my parents raised me and how they raised my sister. Could be a youngest-oldest thing, tho. The oldest kid always thinks the youngest gets whatever they want, am I wrong? LOL

Anyhoo, I think I turned out well, I'm not a victim of “abuse” and still have a good relationship with both my parents. I don't remember fearing either of my parents more because they spanked me. I don't remember the spanking itself hurting all that much, it was more the fact that I was bad enough to BE spanked and how angry my parents were at the time. Actually, it's quite interesting what actually works on a kid. My mom was the screamer, more often than not she used volume to try to shut me up and instill respect (and in reality, her volume annoyed me more than anything else, and made me want to scream and yell right back at her… THAT never ended well). My dad on the other hand rarely yelled or spanked me. He's a soft-spoken man… he'd say a couple words to me, and those words would burn a hole in me deeper than any spanking or any yelling in my ear, ever could. I responded best (and still do) to clam, mature, intelligent advice and discussion… compromise…. or even a flat-out line like, “I can't believe you did that… such a brainless act… I never thought my daughter would do something so dumb…”. OUCH. Way more painful than a smack on the rear.

Also, a funny story: a past coworker of mine only spanked her child once. Her 5-year-old daughter wouldn't go to bed… she kept asking for her favorite stuffed rabbit “bun-bun”. Mom didn't care, just wanted her to go to bed already. The tantrum ensued, and mom gave her a quick smack on the behind. The girl stopped crying immediately, stood up, looked mom straight in the eye and said calmly, “I'm not going to bed.. until I get my Bun-Bun.” Mom, in shock, found “bun-bun”, handed it to her daughter, and right off to bed she went, no crying, no stomping, no problems at all. I have no idea if the spanking worked, or didn't work in that scenario, but I find the story f'n hilarious. Mom vowed to never spank her again.
yep my sister is the youngest
Zoey: i need some chinese lets go to the nail salon

Holly: Uh Zoey they'll kind of freak if a zombie starts eating the nail
lady

Zoey: Fine lets get mexican they deliver with miracle grow
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:07PM
Puff at 8:22PM, July 2, 2007
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good spanking okay but cutting or something like that not right i had to get on my nees wich hurt because we had rocks in the corner
Well I don't know if I'd consider “Cutting” “Punching” “rocks-on-kees” as spankings. People are taking things a bit loosely these days.

I must admit though, rocks on knees hurt. D:
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last edited on July 14, 2011 2:54PM
EmilyTheStrange at 5:34PM, July 5, 2007
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The one time my mom ever spanked me was after a huge fight when I was ten. I had just transfered to a new school and was having problems with a girl in my class and my mom was in a really horrid mood, so things escalated quickly. Anyways she threw me on the floor and beat me with a shoe. .___. Actually the black and blue I got was so bad the I couldn't sit right for a few days and my teacher threatened to call child services.

So I'm not in favor of spanking….
Granted I probably deserved it and my mom was having a really bad month (it was about 3 weeks after 9/11 and we're from New York, so…) but that one insident “tramuatised” me into being afraid of anyone coming within a certain radius of my backside. It didn't teach me any sort of respect and I was afraid of my mom for months.

So yeah. >>'
I don't really remember acting out much, but (except for that once incident) my parents found better ways to punish me, most of which included making me stay in my room or ignoring me until I shut up. They seemed to work pretty well, I have a very good relationship with my parents now. I just don't think hitting your kids does much.



last edited on July 14, 2011 12:21PM
TrueNamu at 5:55PM, July 5, 2007
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Well I can see where a lot of people are coming from,I mean sometimes it escalates to the point of child abuse, but it's just like hitting a child on the hand or forcefully pushing them somewhere,if it's not extremely painful to the child then it should be ok. I mean most memories are stronger when there is a pain involved, I mean children will learn what needs to be learned quicker if they have an initiative not to do it. Not saying every child should be spanked though. Some kids learn things just from being told, but those inexplicably devious children sometimes deserve a swift tap on the ass.
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last edited on July 14, 2011 4:34PM
Aurora Moon at 6:35PM, July 5, 2007
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EmilyTheStrange
The one time my mom ever spanked me was after a huge fight when I was ten. I had just transfered to a new school and was having problems with a girl in my class and my mom was in a really horrid mood, so things escalated quickly. Anyways she threw me on the floor and beat me with a shoe. .___. Actually the black and blue I got was so bad the I couldn't sit right for a few days and my teacher threatened to call child services.

THAT IS NOT SPANKING!!!!! GOD, PEOPLE LIKE YOU KEEP ON GETTING ABUSE AND SPANKING CONFUSED!!

LET'S RUN BY IT AGAIN.

SPANKING: QUICK OPEN-HANDED SLAPS TO THE REAR END WITH YOUR HAND. NOT HARD ENOUGH TO CAUSE ANY BRUISES OR MENTAL TRANMA. JUST ENOUGH TO JOLT THE CHILD OUT OF THEIR BAD BEHAVIOR THAT THEY'VE BEEN REPEATDLY TOLD TO STOP.

ABUSE: HITTING THE CHILD HARD ENOUGH WITH AN OBJECT TO CAUSE BRUISES, DONE IN ANGER, AND MAKING THE CHILD SCARED OF YOU FOR MONTHS OR YEARS.

THERE'S A DIFFERENCE, PEOPLE!!
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last edited on July 14, 2011 11:10AM
Argent_Nightmare at 4:15AM, July 6, 2007
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Yes. Spanking is more than Okay. spanking is GREAT.
Let me tell you the story *I* remember most as to why spanking is a good idea…
A young boy–my uncle–was told not to play in the street. He didn't listen, and got the belt, as he rightly deserved. He was oh-so-jealous of his friend, who had parents that told him not to play in the street, but preferred to scold rather than punish, and put in ‘time out’ rather than spank.
My uncle is alive and in his late 30s.
His friend died at the age of 9 to a car.

At any rate… I am raising my own kids the way I was raised. Harsh discapline and large rewards. Why?
Because I consider myself a well-adjusted individual. I don't think any arbitrary government has any right to control my descisions on raising my kids.
Now… If I was seriously hurting my kids, I would expect someone to shoot me, not send me to jail or make up stupid laws that someone like that wouldn't listen to ANYWAYS…
Spanking your kids is good. By leather belt I was blessed, and so shall be the next generation.
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last edited on July 14, 2011 11:01AM
Hawk at 10:03AM, July 6, 2007
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I was raised with lots of spankings, and I think I turned out okay. In fact, I'm not completely sure how I'll raise my future kids, but I'd imagine a swat on the butt wouldn't be out of the question when situation really calls for it.

What's strange is that as I look down the line of siblings, they got spanked less and less. I think my youngest brother never got spanked at all. I think younger siblings can actually learn through seeing their older siblings' punishments. Either that or older siblings naturally keep them in line. Whatever the case, I'll look forward to my youngest kids being the most well-behaved.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:46PM
TnTComic at 10:07AM, July 6, 2007
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What's strange is that as I look down the line of siblings, they got spanked less and less. I think my youngest brother never got spanked at all. I think younger siblings can actually learn through seeing their older siblings' punishments.

Its because the parents aren't as worked up about it. Same goes for doctor visits. I'm going through it now, with my wife. She gets so worked up about anything with our kid.
I don't. Kids are tough. She'll figure it out. I joked with her on Wednesday, “every time we take the kid to UrgentCare, you're the one who feels better.”

As for spanking… go for it. If it works, do it. If it doesn't, don't. I don't see it as abuse. Kids are simple critters, and too many parents don't understand that negative reinforcement is just as, if not more, useful as positive reinforcement.
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:31PM
Hawk at 10:11AM, July 6, 2007
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Its because the parents aren't as worked up about it.

You're probably right about that. My parents sure mellowed out over the years. Well, at least my dad did. And he was the primary spanker.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:46PM
flyingwind66 at 10:36AM, July 11, 2007
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spanking doesn't really teach the kid much.

yer just dismissing the problem and answering it with violence.
so the kid grows up thinking violence solves problems.

let him/her get a chance to know the mistake and try to solve the problem and advice them on how to prevent future mistakes.

talk it out. most kids are smart enough to understand.


I like that… and I think it's true. My parents always hit me as a kid and when I got older, I started hitting other ppl when they were mean to me (mind you I'm tiny, most ppl just brush it off) and I got in trouble for it a lot in 5th grade and to be honest, no matter how many times people came to our school to tell us what physical abuse was and that it was wrong, it never connected that I was a victim. Maybe it was just that I didn't want to be a victim so somehow I justified it. But it wasn't until 7th grade when I kept calling this one friend while I was a sobbing wreck after I got hit that anything ever happened… she told the school counselor and they sent social workers to my house. After words my parents gave me hell about ‘what? you want us to go to jail? do you want to be put into foster care and have all your stuff taken away?’. The physical abuse stopped after but then the emotional abuse escalated.

Since they couldn't hit me anymore they just yelled at me, it got really bad and in the end of that, I almost wished they would hit me instead because the yelling was worse. In 9th grade I started hurting myself… self mutilation, yeah that's what became of me, sad isn't it? What kind of parent are you if push them into doing something like that? I didn't want to kill myself because if I did, they THEY won… and I can't give them the satisfaction of that.

11th grade was when I ‘quit’ instead I took to going for a run or a walk instead. See, when you hurt yourself, it gives you a sort of ‘high’ because your brain releases horomones and adrenaline and your problems all seem a million miles away. It's addictive… how messed is that? Running achieved mostly the same thing and I'm glad I went out of my way to look for different ways to deal… because I knew it was sick to hurt myself in the first place… and to be honest, whenever I have a fight with my parents, I STILL want to hurt myself… you can't quit, you just don't do it for the rest of your life.

Apparently the spanking laws here in Canada are now “you can spank a child but only once and not in anger”. I don't care what the laws are, I don't think spanking a child is right on any level… maybe others think I turned out ok, but I still think I'm messed up inside.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:30PM
Aurora Moon at 2:03PM, July 11, 2007
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spanking and hitting an child is very much different. looks like I have to repeat myself:

THAT IS NOT SPANKING!!!!! GOD, PEOPLE LIKE YOU KEEP ON GETTING ABUSE AND SPANKING CONFUSED!!

LET'S RUN BY IT AGAIN.

SPANKING: QUICK OPEN-HANDED SLAPS TO THE REAR END WITH YOUR HAND. NOT HARD ENOUGH TO CAUSE ANY BRUISES OR MENTAL TRANMA. JUST ENOUGH TO JOLT THE CHILD OUT OF THEIR BAD BEHAVIOR THAT THEY'VE BEEN REPEATDLY TOLD TO STOP. ONLY USED AS AN LAST RESORT WHEN THE CHILDREN IS STUBBORN AND REFUSES TO LISTEN WHEN DOING DANGEROUS THINGS.

ABUSE: HITTING THE CHILD HARD ENOUGH WITH AN OBJECT OR HANDS TO CAUSE BRUISES, DONE IN ANGER, AND MAKING THE CHILD SCARED OF YOU FOR MONTHS OR YEARS. ALSO CAN TURN CHILDREN INTO EMOTIONAL WRECKS. IF THE CHILD IS HIT ANYWHERE ELSE OTHER THAN THE REAR END, SUCH AS THE FACE THAT IS ABUSE.

THERE'S A DIFFERENCE, PEOPLE!!
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last edited on July 14, 2011 11:10AM
Phantom Penguin at 2:28PM, July 11, 2007
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I got the belt growing up. And my Dad really knew how to fling that bastard around. Like he was a belt samurai of some sort.

I'm a little late on this one, but I think spanking is a pefectly fine way of punishing children, as long as its on their bottoms and not in the face. And its a open hand (hence ‘spanking’ and not ‘punching’).

I'm tried of bleeding heart people saying laying your hands on your kids is wrong “because it damages them”. I'm not bringing them outback and beating them gang style. One or two smacks on the ass is enough to show them “hey if I do this, I will get spanked”. If I make him stand in the corner I know I would have thought “pfft I break the rules this is all I have to do?”

And I personally believe that kind of thing carrys on in life.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:42PM
MagickLorelai at 5:52PM, July 11, 2007
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I agree with Aurora- it's exasperating that people are confusing Spanking with Abuse. There is a difference between being struck by a shoe or a belt until you're black and blue and bleeding, and being spanked openhanded on the rump. MAJOR difference. I'm sorry for you people who've been hit in such a way, because you were hit with anger, not discipline.

Other people have said it: Make sure the kid knows what they're getting spanked for, and make sure it's no more than a few swats. I was raised when I was really little with this method, and pretty soon I learned how to avoid behaviors that earned me a spanking. It's probably why I have respect for other people. Other kids who don't get that kind of discipline end up spoiled brats with rotten attitudes.

And again: Discipline. Not Angry Abuse. And as for people who get depressed, that's a product of our culture. Yes, it's a mental disease, but it's also a mindset that we put ourselves into. I'm speaking as someone who's been at the worst of depression and am recovering back to a moderately normal mindset purely from the power of knowing that I can, will, and do feel better. Yes, I was diagnosed with clinical depression. By three different psychiatrists. Spanking a kid should have no influence on how depressed the kid is, and if the kid IS depressed enough that a spanking will make them forever humiliated and push them over the edge, they need help, FAST.

Oh, but, you know, this is just an alternative to a future of kids who are selfish, spoiled, lazy, self-absorbed brats with no respect for other human beings, who have no work ethic, and have no desire to contribute back to the society, except in rare occasions. There are other ways to lecture and teach kids, but spanking shouldn't be considered a BAD thing when it's done right!

last edited on July 14, 2011 1:50PM
Ryan McLelland at 9:50AM, July 12, 2007
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I think I might smack my son's hand…but not hard. I'd rather put him on timeout which he really really hates.

I'd never…EVER…spank him. But then…he's not really that bad…at least yet.
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:15PM
Rori at 3:46PM, July 18, 2007
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Well, I really don't care whether people spank their kids or not. I'd rather they didn't do it around me, though. If I want a show I'll pay for it like a normal human being (and the participants will be adult, and “well-formed”).

I probably won't spank my kids. I have a bad temper. I'll probably just lecture them for hours, oh, the guilt, THE GUILT!!!

One thing I don't get about this debate is the reduction that somehow: not spanking=spoiled brats. There's so much more that goes into it than that. Seriously.
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:11PM
neohobo at 4:44PM, July 18, 2007
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spanking is ok to help kids learn discipline, but it should only be used as a last resort
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:10PM
Roguehill at 7:48AM, July 19, 2007
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I remember my mother would swat us with a flyswat if we were misbehaving (oh, and we did misbehave), which was a stinging but harmless way to get our attention.
That's what we're talking about. Spanking only works when it is used infrequently and appropriately, which is hard to make fast rules about because it differs from child to child.
My wife was raised in an abusive atmosphere and would never spank her son, while I was raised in a very loving family and approve of spanking.
Kids know when they're getting spanked and when their getting beaten……most people do. Since they both involve physical contact, it's often hard to measure the distinction…

-Dave

GHOST ZERO
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:09PM
MagickLorelai at 3:53PM, July 19, 2007
(online)
posts: 320
joined: 1-20-2006
Roguehill
I remember my mother would swat us with a flyswat if we were misbehaving (oh, and we did misbehave), which was a stinging but harmless way to get our attention.
That's what we're talking about. Spanking only works when it is used infrequently and appropriately, which is hard to make fast rules about because it differs from child to child.
My wife was raised in an abusive atmosphere and would never spank her son, while I was raised in a very loving family and approve of spanking.
Kids know when they're getting spanked and when their getting beaten……most people do. Since they both involve physical contact, it's often hard to measure the distinction…

-Dave

100% agree with you. Thank you. There are ways to abuse kids that don't even involve physical violence! There's verbal abuse, and emotional and mental abuse. My mother abused me for years without laying a single finger on me.

Spanking a kid is so very not the same as abuse, and I honestly think that the biggest detractors of spanking are those who were abused and made to think that was normal spanking, or those who have been fortunate as to never need spanking to set them in line, and don't know the good it really does kids who step out of line. There are other options for punishing kids, but there are kids who just won't respond to anything but a quick thwap to the butt.

last edited on July 14, 2011 1:50PM
shaneronzio at 4:02PM, July 19, 2007
(online)
posts: 497
joined: 12-4-2006
Spank the wife not the child.
;)

—-
to be honest…When I was a 12 yr old whiskey drinking brat punk ass kid, my Dad gave me a proper beat down.

Thank god he did, It kept me out of trouble, I respected him for it and I had it coming.

I believe a parental physical correction should only be used when there is no other option, when all other means of discipline are exhausted.
Oh no! did I say discipline! Fakk yeah.

Idle youth leads to a Bitter Old Age.

Hey…I don't know if any of you have noticed, but, not all kids are little angels.

some can be tough nasty bastards.

Current Project:CROSS WORLDS NEXUS
Updates Monday, Wenzday & FRIDAY
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:32PM
Drifterxgs at 2:12PM, July 22, 2007
(online)
posts: 37
joined: 3-7-2007
I was a child of the spanking age and am a supporter of it. I am like most people however not a supporter of the massive leaps and degrees which spanking takes and the people who pass abuse off as an okay thing. I got spanked with hand and belt, I got the soap in the mouth, I got flicked on the ear by my father when I misbehaved as well, which believe it or not acts as a deterrent to mischief in public settings.

Those things are not that bad as they reinforce the idea that negative actions will be punished, continually in some way.However, abuse and actions that take bounds further than need be usually only reinforce the idea that such actions are okay and in fact become negatives which the child then carries and emulates on his child(not always, but a link does exist between abusers and the abuse they had as children). Also not all children are the same, sometimes a spanking only emboldens a child, whereas taking away his favorite toy or removing the objects in his/her room of choice(videogames, tv, radio) may be a much better punishment. The rules are never set in heavy stone on such things and sometimes have to be created new.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:17PM

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