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Masturbation Cause Blockages?
Eunice P at 1:24AM, Aug. 5, 2007
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Can this be possible?



Re:Masturbation in Showers


We have found several blockages in showers in university owned
accommodation,most commonly caused by human hair.

However,over last term we found many of these blockages to be caused
by large quantities of what we have now determined to be semen.

This is intolerable,and we shall be tracing the culprits by means of
DNA matching if the problem persists.

May we advise students who wish to masturbate to do so in the comfort
of their own rooms,rather than in the showers.

Thank you for taking time to read this document.



P Robinson,
Director,
Estates and Buildings
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:23PM
herio at 2:26AM, Aug. 5, 2007
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lol

last edited on July 14, 2011 12:47PM
MagickLorelai at 6:03AM, Aug. 5, 2007
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-_- Forgive me if this is just ignorance, but how can SEMEN clog a drain? Maybe by clinging to hair… Even so, that's a moment of TMI.

last edited on July 14, 2011 1:50PM
mechanical_lullaby at 11:55AM, Aug. 5, 2007
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hunh…
whatsit do to toilets then?
pretty freaking hilarious though.
darn kids, stop masturbating in m'showers.

last edited on July 14, 2011 1:57PM
Kohdok at 5:10PM, Aug. 5, 2007
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Yeah, I'm a little puzzled as to how a liquid can clog something, too. I'm thinking it got latched onto the hairs that were analyzed.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:20PM
SarahN at 10:45PM, Aug. 5, 2007
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huh!? lol!
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:23PM
particle man at 11:56PM, Aug. 5, 2007
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Wow, that is jacked. huh!?
“Doing the things a particle can since 1986.”
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:39PM
lefarce at 12:41AM, Aug. 6, 2007
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Harley Quinn
Mistah Jay is always makin' weird sounds when he's in his room all alone, I think that's what he's doin'.

What?

 
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:31PM
Phantom Penguin at 2:14AM, Aug. 6, 2007
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My question is who beats off in a public shower?
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:42PM
My Lady of Sorrow at 2:40AM, Aug. 6, 2007
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sorry this is all i can manage….

lawl :D
I'm still trying to think of something funny to put here.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:09PM
Kohdok at 10:33PM, Aug. 6, 2007
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particle man
Wow, that is jacked. huh!?

Literally.

Phantom Penguin
My question is who beats off in a public shower?

Good question. I sure wouldn't. I still love that line that they should do it within the privacy of their own rooms.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:20PM
Disgruntledrm at 1:14AM, Aug. 7, 2007
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Am I the only person who thinks it's funny that they're getting it DNA tested just for clogging their showers?

Seems a bit extreme to me.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:12PM
Wark_Ento at 7:54AM, Aug. 7, 2007
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I think that's hilarious. Especially the DNA testing part. I doubt they'd go through all that trouble to find out who the “culprits” are. XD
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:46PM
vgman at 5:17PM, Aug. 7, 2007
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It's not that hard to DNA test. Just send the stuff to a lab along with a small amount of cash wait a few days and there you have it.

Also lol!
RIP TD :cry2:
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:40PM
Dark Clown at 5:49PM, Aug. 7, 2007
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All I got to say is. if someone is gonna wax ham don't you want them to do it in the one room with a Floor drain? I mean I wouldn't want someone pulling Pud where I sleep. its just not cricket. so some hard up kids played whack-a-weasel in the shower. isent the embarrassment of doing that in a public shower not punishment enough??

and who would of guessed that a combination of hair and baby batter would clog up drains. hell I for one thought protein monkey squirts washed away in water.

Think about it. if it is thick enough to clog a drain, how bad did that poor soul need to snap one off?

I say pass the jerkins and Shampoo. at least there not blasting tube-steak yogurt on the walls.

This Fluid feels like Pain, This stoic mood is all in vain.
I reach into the dark, I tear this other me apart.
How many years ago, How many deaths I can't let go.
My Flesh Is Temporary, My God Extraordinary.
You… can''t… Kill… My… MIND!!!!!

The War Will continue, Just on a different battle field
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:05PM
FanGurlZ at 7:18PM, Aug. 7, 2007
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Wow!
Homophobia: The irrational fear that gays will break in and re-arrange your furniture against your will.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:25PM
warren at 8:50PM, Aug. 9, 2007
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Yeah…. gotta call bullshit on this one. Although I hope that someone didn't actually have to remove semen hair globs from a shower.
Warren

On the Duck:
Title -updating! ~30 strips!
PAC -New! >10 strips.

Others:
Spare Change -updating! ~2000 strips!
Mass Production -hiatus. ~300 strips.

This guy does Piss Mario, Stick, and Filler!
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:48PM
Exzachly at 11:19PM, Aug. 9, 2007
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Durham is one sexually repressed university. The name Durham even has a sexually repressed vibe.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:24PM
Lord Shplane at 3:24PM, Aug. 10, 2007
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Seriously, who does that in the shower? You can't look at porn in the shower, it'll either waterlog the magazines or fry your computer.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:39PM
deletedbyrequest03 at 4:22PM, Aug. 10, 2007
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I have a great idea! Maybe, since showers give out WATER, they can clean all the semen out with chemicals! Oh, god… What the hell am I THINKING?! Am I a monster?! It can't be done!!!

But seriously… This is a load of bull (or semen)… Get your lazy ass off that computer chair, P Robinson, and hire more janitors to un-clog it. It's okay that your students are hormonally healthy.

This is almost as bull-sht as my school. Only, we can't afford showers :D

This year, school's full of BS!!!
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:05PM
Phantom Penguin at 6:27PM, Aug. 10, 2007
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warren
Yeah…. gotta call bullshit on this one. Although I hope that someone didn't actually have to remove semen hair globs from a shower.

Easily the worst job i've heard of.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:42PM
ssbguy at 8:17PM, Aug. 10, 2007
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WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT FUCK ASS FUCK!?
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:55PM
jmt at 10:01PM, Aug. 11, 2007
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I am not sure, I bet Pete North can clog a shower if he would build it up for a few days. Maybe this isn't BS?


http://www.drunkduck.com/The_Nonstandard_Assembly/


http://www.jonnyaxx.com/
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:09PM
Exzachly at 1:54AM, Aug. 12, 2007
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jmt
I am not sure, I bet Pete North can clog a shower if he would build it up for a few days. Maybe this isn't BS?

He can probably do other things with it too, like Spidey-swing.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:24PM
vgman at 2:25AM, Aug. 12, 2007
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Exzachly
jmt
I am not sure, I bet Pete North can clog a shower if he would build it up for a few days. Maybe this isn't BS?

He can probably do other things with it too, like Spidey-swing.

Oh I so did not need that.
RIP TD :cry2:
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:40PM
Adariel at 9:21PM, Aug. 12, 2007
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Phantom Penguin
warren
Yeah…. gotta call bullshit on this one. Although I hope that someone didn't actually have to remove semen hair globs from a shower.

Easily the worst job i've heard of.

Oh that poor janitor guy.

Maybe he got tired of it altogether and decided to inform the higher authorities, thus the memo.

last edited on July 14, 2011 10:45AM
Priceman at 10:36PM, Aug. 12, 2007
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Eunice P
This is intolerable,and we shall be tracing the culprits by means of DNA matching if the problem persists.


Now maybe i'm just not a expert in this, but wouldn't it take ALOT of semen to clog a drain? This means that more than likely, it's semen from different “donors”. This means that a DNA test will probably result people thinking that some kind of mutant is running rampant in the shower room thanks to all the mixed “DNA”.

This is too funny.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:47PM
marine at 11:23AM, Aug. 13, 2007
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Exzachly
jmt
I am not sure, I bet Pete North can clog a shower if he would build it up for a few days. Maybe this isn't BS?

He can probably do other things with it too, like Spidey-swing.

I laughed.. really hard…
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:52PM
mapaghimagsik at 3:07PM, Aug. 14, 2007
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To quote Mandy: “Thats…disturbing”
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:51PM
spellchild at 8:34AM, Aug. 15, 2007
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No way is semen soooo thick it could clog a shower drain. They either need new drains themselves or there are mass orgies goin on in the shower room >_>
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:54PM

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