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Show Me The Money! (The Game Show, Not The Reference To "Jerry Maguire")
Ian Jay at 8:01PM, Nov. 14, 2006
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joined: 1-4-2006
Once in a while a game show comes along that, over time, becomes a beloved piece of our nation's cultural landscape– The Price Is Right, Jeopardy, Family Feud,etcetera. Call me crazy, but I have a feeling that ABC's new show Show Me The Money is not going to be one of those game shows. instead of thinking up something cool and inventive, ABC has begged, borrowed and stolen enough elements from other game shows to create something so lame, so unbelievably god-awful, that it has to be seen to be believed.

Here's the show's official site. That's right, it really exists.

Not unlike Frankenstein's monster, this show is a hodgepodge of gimmicks from other TV shows, all hastily stitched together and given an electric shock from a nine-volt battery instead of a lightning bolt. Elements include:

~A big dramatic set, complete with dramatic music (from Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, Deal Or No Deal, 1 Vs. 100, Russian Roulette, Greed, The Weakest Link, and pretty much every other game show made in the last ten years)
~Mysterious amounts of cash the player must pick from, held by skimpily-clad women (from Deal Or No Deal)
~An “A, B, or C” choice of trivia questions on each turn, all of which involve completing a given phrase (vaguely from Match Game)
~Trivia questions which, to the viewer, seem abysmally stupid, but are apparently too hard for the contestant to guess (from Press Your Luck)
~The catch phrase “Are you locking in your answer?” (roughly adapted from “Is that your final answer?” from Who Wants To Be A Millionaire)
~A “Killer Card” that will force the player to walk away with nothing (a twisted offspring of the Whammy from Press Your Luck)
~Stupid “We'll get to your question… after the break!” commercial segues (from American Idol, though heavily used by Deal Or No Deal)

And to top it all off, in the tradition of Bob Saget (Full House?) hosting 1 Vs. 100 and Howie Mandell (Bobby's World?!?) hosting Deal Or No Deal, Show Me The Money's surprise celebrity host is none other than… William Shatner. (That's right! Mr. Hyper-Ham of Hollywood himself! The man who, in a commercial I saw for Boston Legal while watching Show Me The Money, exclaimed to some faceless coworker, “I think the midget I'm dating might actually be my daughter!”.) Plus the contestants are obviously plants: The first guy was the most obviously gay person in the Western Hemisphere (so much so that Shatner actually routinely commented on it– at one point he pointed to the ladies and said, "I don't know if this will interest you, but these dancers are gonna come out and show you the money!" [Bold face added for emphasis]), and the second guy was a Top Gun pilot for the navy. (He even handed Shatner a Top Gun baseball cap, which “The Shat” declined to wear, stating “It took me an hour to get my hair this way.” Rrrright.)

In the end, I had to turn this show off an hour after it started, though it showed no signs of slowing down– apparently episodes must be two hours or more long, and the gameplay is dreadfully tedious, something akin to removing wallpaper. (However, the questions are so easy it's hard not to leave with upwards of $500,000, and passing the million mark seems like it would be a breeze.) Now, if we get the best-case scenario, Show Me The Money will be cancelled after only one show, possibly during a commercial break tonight. But if we get the worst-case scenario, the show will become a Dancing With The Stars-esque smash hit, lead to a final dissolution of our American culture's concept of taste, and eventually be responsible for the entire fall of Western civilization. If it hasn't fallen already since this show was greenlighted.

In conclusion: Whether you're a Shatner fan, you enjoy watching pretty women stand and do nothing, or you want to confirm your suspicions that we are all miserable excuses for human beings, Show Me The Money will satisfy you… and then some!
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:56PM
mechanical_lullaby at 3:49AM, Nov. 15, 2006
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posts: 1,905
joined: 1-7-2006
There's an obvious solution to this problem that I've been practicing for years. Don't watch TV. I don't and it makes me– well, it makes me culturally and media-knowhow awkward, but it also allows me to not be consumed into drivel. I watch some newschannels … and god knows I have to endure my mom's constant “I'm on a Court-TV frenzy because that's all I watch”. She'll watch cases of horrible, twisted bloody things that actually happen– and the Jerry Springer show– and not raise an eyebrow, but when I'll show her some fiction movie I found she'll gasp when Danny McEvilCorporationGuy pulls out a gun on people such as David Arquette. I like David Arquette, he just has a habit of being in such baaaad movies.
But it's the same thing with game shows, which are probably on a fourth of the time at my house. I can't stand watching them anymore because of the stupid little things involved. I mean, okay, I'll watch The Price is Right just to hear the one dude say, “And it's a brand new Caaahhhhhr.” But that's about it. Bottom line is, I don't think I can stand to see another game show, and now I'll avoid this one at all costs.

Besides, if people stop watching it, the ratings drop and the show's pulled.

Sadly this is mostly what happens with public access channels. They have shows, just no one knows about them.

last edited on July 14, 2011 1:56PM
AQua_ng at 12:00PM, Nov. 15, 2006
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This looks like an excellent show…

K.A.L.A-dan! Brigade Captain :D
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last edited on July 14, 2011 10:55AM
AQua_ng at 12:00PM, Nov. 15, 2006
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posts: 7,830
joined: 4-6-2006
…for me to poop on.

K.A.L.A-dan! Brigade Captain :D
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last edited on July 14, 2011 10:55AM
ccs1989 at 12:38PM, Nov. 15, 2006
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posts: 2,656
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First off, you need to become a television critic.

Second off, I have not seen this show, and never will, thanks to that review. I'll never understand how shows like Justice League Unlimited are canceled and yet shows like these get created.
http://ccs1989.deviantart.com

“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.”
-Henry David Thoreau, Walden
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:38AM

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