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The X-Files: I Want to Believe
SpANG at 11:14AM, Aug. 4, 2008
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I wanted to believe this would be good. I wanted to believe that the story would be well written, and there would be character development.

In reality, what I got was an X-Files episode. Which wouldn't have been a bad thing, except it was a particularly poorly written X-Files episode.

First of all, the pacing is just horrible. The movie drags on and on when this whole thing could have been done and solved in a half hour.

Mulder and Scully are back, and they are tired. There is no enthusiasm for anything anymore. The actors play them seemingly because they have gotten a paycheck. They do not commit to the roles or care about any integrity of their characters. They just read their lines and never question.

A reclusive Mulder (the first throw-away line in the movie is about the FBI screwing him but nothing is ever explained) gets involved in a case by way of Scully, who is now a doctor who whines “Blah. Blah. Blah. I can't hear you. I don't want to get involved” throughout the entire movie. I just wanted Mulder to say "YOU GOT ME INVOLVED BITCH!"

Scully's FBI professionalism is gone when she questions a witness, who happens to be a psychic preist. Oh, and he's a pedophile. Thanks, type-casting.

Meanwhile Scully is doing stem-cell research for a patient - USING GOOGLE. Not a medical database, not using her old FBI contacts to get in contact with doctors that have has success with stem cell research. FUCKING GOOGLE. Here's your check from Google, Twentieth Century Fox. Choke on it.

Then while Mulder and Scully are in bed (yes, they did it) the second throw away line about their dead son (who died around 9 years old or something). Aaand that's it. No flashbacks to happier times, no shots of the kid, no pictures. How lovely.

This movie doesn't end up being supernatural. It ends up that the pedo-priest is a liar and a bunch of cardboard cut-out villains are doing Frankenstein experiments in their barn. The whole thing is just so stupid.

One of the worst acting jobs in this film is performed by Alvin ‘Xzibit’ Joiner, playing a one-dimensional FBI agent. Seriously, he sucks. Amanda Peet does a better job, but she gets killed of pretty quickly, as Gillian Anderson seemily can't get upstaged by someone younger.


Cris Carter phoned this one in, big time. This movie was a slap in the face to any X-Files fan.
“To a rational mind, nothing is inexplicable. Only unexplained.”
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:53PM
Hawk at 12:17PM, Aug. 4, 2008
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You know, I agree with pretty much everything you said, Spang… though I probably enjoyed the movie more than you did. I certainly did leave the theater feeling like I had just watched a long episode of X-Files.

There are pretty much no “Wow” moments in the entire movie. There is nothing to elevate it above the typical TV fare, unlike the first movie which exceeded the TV show in budget, visuals, and story. This might have made a decent straight-to-DVD release, but sorry Mulder, I just saw The Dark Knight on the big screen and this two-hour TV episode just doesn't compare.

Expel all those high expectations, and it actually felt good and nostalgic to see my favorite FBI agents back in action. That kept me from leaving the theater upset.

Duchovny once said that he'd like to see the X-Files become a series of movies like Star Trek. I have no problem with that, except that if this happens than they better put them all straight to DVD or quadruple their efforts, because the Star Trek movies were an immense step up from the TV episodes.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:46PM
bobhhh at 2:24PM, Aug. 4, 2008
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Hawk
because the Star Trek movies were an immense step up from the TV episodes.

I know this is off topic, but I couldn't let that go by. Some fancy FX doesn't necessarily elevate the Trek films above the TV series. At least half of those films flat out suck. I'll stack up City on the Edge of Forever up against ST1 and ST5 any day.
My name is Bob and I approved this signature.
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:30AM
Hawk at 2:51PM, Aug. 4, 2008
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Hey, I won't claim to be a fan of Star Trek or its movies, but the movies are more than just a higher budget and better effects (although those two things do factor into elevating it above the TV show episodes). The Star Trek movies also went farther than the TV show in terms of theme and scope. They also had significant events happen (like Spock dying, or Scotty using a Macintosh)

That's what this new X-files was missing. Higher budget, better effects, a larger and more daring scope, and any sort of significant event involving the characters.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:46PM
ozoneocean at 6:40AM, Aug. 5, 2008
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I loved Spang's review there! Brilliant! :)

X-files the TV show irritated me with that Kyupol reality it portrayed. It was a tolerable series when it was a bunch of non-connected episodes about Fortean occurrences, but when it went into something more overarching and silly I left it for good.

I've heard some interviews on the BBC4 radio programme Front Row and the film programme they have there with both Carter and Duchovey. From what I heard, I like the idea that they put aside the majority of the Kyupolisims for a while and took a nore conventional approach.
But Spang's reviews has made me have second thought. Was it really that bad?

—-
I have to say, the thing that DID appeal to me in the original series was when Mulder was all on his OWN in his belief in weird stuff, Sculley was always for normal explanations, and the mystery would turn out to be that something WAS weird, but not as crazy as Mulder had originally thought.

But I always wished there'd be more times when it turned out Sculley was 100% right and that is was just an ordinary mystery and Mulder was completely wrong.

Duchovy's humour ws something that could drag me back too. I appreciated that.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:32PM
Hawk at 9:25AM, Aug. 5, 2008
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ozoneocean
I've heard some interviews on the BBC4 radio programme Front Row and the film programme they have there with both Carter and Duchovey. From what I heard, I like the idea that they put aside the majority of the Kyupolisims for a while and took a nore conventional approach.
But Spang's reviews has made me have second thought. Was it really that bad?

If you lower your expectations to the level of “it's an additional X-Files episode” then I don't think it's that bad. If you want more X-Files, it's worth renting.

And I agree with you on the themes… it was more fun when it was a different monster or boogeyman each week. I've heard that was Carter's intention for any new additional movies, and I'd like to see that happen, given some changes over how this last one was done.


ozoneocean
I have to say, the thing that DID appeal to me in the original series was when Mulder was all on his OWN in his belief in weird stuff, Sculley was always for normal explanations, and the mystery would turn out to be that something WAS weird, but not as crazy as Mulder had originally thought.

But I always wished there'd be more times when it turned out Sculley was 100% right and that is was just an ordinary mystery and Mulder was completely wrong.

Duchovy's humour ws something that could drag me back too. I appreciated that.

I agree with all that, too.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:46PM
subcultured at 2:58PM, Aug. 8, 2008
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i hate hate HATE alien episodes of xfiles. i usually turn the channel when it comes to govt/aliens conspiracy bullshit. the episodes i like were the ones that were weird and had a beginning and an end in one or 2 episode.

my favs were tooms, eel man, man eating fireflies, devil kid, psychic man (frank from ‘everybody loves raymond’), werewolf (in style of COPS)…etc.

i couldn't stand the stupid alien storyline which to me never got anywhere. i did like the quirky alien episodes such as the body switching with mulder and fake aliens being abducted…those were funny.


never saw any xfiles movie cause they were alien storylines…except for the newest one.

lately i've been buying the box sets and watching the old eps.
J
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:03PM
Hawk at 7:42PM, Aug. 8, 2008
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Yeah, those are my favorite kinds of episodes, too.

Back when I was watching the show during its initial run, I didn't mind the alien episodes. In fact, I was interested in them because I thought I would find something out about the “big conspiracy” or Mulder's sister, or who the cigarette smoking man was. Boy was I fooled. In retrospect they never really told you much, and what they did tell you didn't matter. So I no longer like those episodes.

My favorite episodes are the ones where the writers decide to have a little fun and do something funny. Sometimes they even throw in celebrities like Burt Reynolds or Alex Trebek. Luckily they kept these funny episodes rare enough that they were a pleasant surprise.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:46PM
ozoneocean at 9:39PM, Aug. 8, 2008
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Hawk and Hawk
truth
Exactly.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:32PM
mlai at 12:07AM, Aug. 9, 2008
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IMO the alien episodes were sort of worthless once X-Files became mainstream. It's not just that the alien arc plotline never went anywhere except dead ends… it's more because it's a big hub-bub about a story you already know. Government conspiracy cover-up about frozen aliens who crash landed in Roswell? Extracting dead alien DNA to experiment on humans? Don't we already know all the details without X-Files turning it into 5 seasons?

FIGHT current chapter: Filling In The Gaps
FIGHT_2 current chapter: Light Years of Gold
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:06PM
subcultured at 12:43AM, Aug. 9, 2008
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same with millennium…i liked the first few seasons where it was psycho hardcore in the spirit of ‘seven’ then it got stupider
J
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:03PM
ozoneocean at 3:58AM, Aug. 9, 2008
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I liked Millennium when it was funny ^_^
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:32PM
jalford at 4:38PM, Aug. 9, 2008
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This should've been a made-for-DVD flick, like the last 2 Stargate movies.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:06PM

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