General Discussion

What is the funniest thing you have ever written as an answer for a test?
Will at 4:15AM, March 6, 2007
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I find these hilarious, my friends and i were chatting about funny test answers pretty much all through free period, honestly i have never laughed so hard in my life… it is amazing what some people can get away with without being given a good talking to :P

one I remember pretty well from years ago:

expand: 5(x+5)

= 5……….(……..x……….+………..5……..)

Another example was when i was continually told to pick an essay from 1 to 3 for an English assesment… I handed up the assignment sheet up at the end of the day with “1” circled… after the teacher had her laugh i handed up the essay… to this day i wonder if she expected me to just walk out…

the last one I wasn't so sure about…
my friend really hates religeous studies. He says that in the end of semester exams concerning religeon he just wrote “God” for every answer, arguing that God is the answer to everything… and that he actually passed (probably because most answers to RE questions is “God”, they are so damn easy).
he was probably hoping to get kicked out of RE, as it is a compulsory subject all through to graduation

so, have you ever put funny answers to test questions you couldn't answer? entertain meh!
Will
putting your own quote into your sig is the post pretentious and pathetic thing anyone could ever do.
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:49PM
LIZARD_B1TE at 5:01AM, March 6, 2007
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Pop Quiz on the Odyssey:

Q: Why does the princess not want to bring Odysseus home with her?

A: He's a naked old guy.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:36PM
LowResAtari at 7:03AM, March 6, 2007
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Back in middle school…

Question: What is the difference between H2O and CO2?

My Answer?

“H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water”
99% of people would've finished this sente
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:48PM
kingofsnake at 7:14AM, March 6, 2007
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Physics 101

Question: When a magnet is run across a metal bar, what causes the opposing force on the magnet?

My Answer: There are hundreds of invisible lepruchans living in the metal bar. As it has been well documented lepruchans have a severe allergy to all types of magnetisim. When the magnets are drawn across the metal the lepruchans flee the bar and use their magical lepruchan powers to travel instantaneously back to mother Ireland, where they get raucously drunk. So drunk in fact that they lose track of their concept of time, and whent they use their magical lepruchan powers to travel home to their metal bar they accidentally travel to a moment in time prior to when they actually left. For an instant this influx of lepruchans to the metal bar, and the bend of time/space that this creates builds up a magical lepruchan time force (MLTF) which hinders the magnet.




I didn't do well in physics.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:15PM
LIZARD_B1TE at 7:19AM, March 6, 2007
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Heh. On one multiple choice science test, one of the answers for “what causes atoms to bond?” was “tiny men with hammers”
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:36PM
Freux at 7:47AM, March 6, 2007
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My friends and I used to answer tough biology/ecology questions with “Because GOD said so.” Being from the south, the teachers were a little hesitant to mark it wrong.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:31PM
WingNut at 9:20AM, March 6, 2007
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I once answered all of my questions on a history test in haiku.

The best part was all the answers were right, and my teacher and I had a ‘talk’ afterward about me putting my creative talents into more productive venues. I still think it was funny as hell. ;D

-W
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:50PM
reconjsh at 9:46AM, March 6, 2007
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WingNut
I once answered all of my questions on a history test in haiku.

The best part was all the answers were right, and my teacher and I had a ‘talk’ afterward about me putting my creative talents into more productive venues. I still think it was funny as hell. ;D

-W

That is hilarious! Maybe a new test/classroom rule became “no poetry for answers”. lol
last edited on July 14, 2011 3:02PM
AQua_ng at 10:18AM, March 6, 2007
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Describe what Utility Software is.

“Utility software”

K.A.L.A-dan! Brigade Captain :D
K.A.L.A.-dan forums!
last edited on July 14, 2011 10:55AM
Zac at 10:51AM, March 6, 2007
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Kind of like the first post..but different.

Latin test in Highschool I put
“Jesus is the answer to every question”
And the teacher wrote on the test
“That's true, so I'll give you half credit, but don't do this again”
XD

Then in Latin 2 I tried it again, but my new teacher just said “Funny, Zac. But that's wrong”.
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:53PM
Priceman at 11:56AM, March 6, 2007
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When i was confused on those “Scantron” Test, i just answered: “ABACADABA” all the way down.

It got me through High School.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:47PM
AQua_ng at 12:05PM, March 6, 2007
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I was concluded tht God is an ape in my R.E. test.

“The evolution can agree with Christianity, as God is personal, which means that he has human qualities, as it states ”God made man in His image“. This can lead to God being an ape”.

K.A.L.A-dan! Brigade Captain :D
K.A.L.A.-dan forums!
last edited on July 14, 2011 10:55AM
Tantz Aerine at 12:50PM, March 6, 2007
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I actually wrote the book's correct answer in a Religion test, then drew a line and wrote under it: "That was the correct answer according to the book. What I really think is going though is the following:…."

And I wrote another half page. XD

The professor was so bewildered she still remembers me.
 
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:06PM
subcultured at 2:09PM, March 6, 2007
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genius! ^_^
J
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:01PM
Priest_Revan at 2:18PM, March 6, 2007
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subcultured
genius! ^_^

Agreed


As for myself… nothing really. I'm too much of a sucker :(

I did hear about my friend Joe writing on a test answer sheet, “It's my constitutional rights not to have to take this test.”

He failed it…
Updates Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday's (depends).

7/0

Offering Project Wonderful Ad space on my website.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:48PM
Red Slayer at 2:26PM, March 6, 2007
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Name: Broccoli
Day: Of the beast
Class number: 13

last edited on July 14, 2011 3:02PM
kingofsnake at 2:37PM, March 6, 2007
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Does it strike anyone else as odd as to how many DDers were educated at private schools? We ALL had to take religion classes!
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:15PM
Green_Tangerine at 4:15PM, March 6, 2007
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Yeah, I was in the private (Catholic system) too.

The only time I didn't at least try to bullshit my way through a question was after I'd decided to drop Chem 30 (re-took it later) and the school said I had to attend the rest of the weeks' classes. I argued that it was pointless, but they made me sit in that room every day, even though I was leaving it. On one of those days, we had an exam. This is what I wrote, if memory serves me correctly…

1. I'm dropping this
2. class but the
3. administration says
4. that I have
5. to stay until
6. Friday. Please, feel
7. free to kick
8. me out at
9. the beginning of
10. each class so
11. I can do
12. something more productive
13. with my time.

Underneath, the teacher wrote: This explains why you sit at your desk drawing cartoons instead of taking notes. Best of luck?
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:39PM
KomradeDave at 4:23PM, March 6, 2007
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I was ahead in British Lit to the point that I didn't need the final (I could pass without taking it).
One question was to define “sublime,” my answer was “at the same level as or below the level of a lime.”
Handshakes and mustaches are the only ways to know how much you can truly trust a man.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:20PM
LIZARD_B1TE at 5:00PM, March 6, 2007
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These aren't test questions, but they're homework.

Q: What are you doing right now to build up your spiritual strength to better resist any temptation that might come your way.

A: Religion Homework


Q: What is the greatest temptation facing you?

A: Not doing Religion Homework
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:36PM
Terminal at 5:51PM, March 6, 2007
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A while ago, there was an assignment to dumb down one of Shakespeare' plays Julius Caesar. I was to break down the entire play and rewrite it in simple terms.

"Cowards die many times before their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once.
Of all the wonders that I yet have heard,
It seems to me most strange that men should fear;
Seeing that death, a necessary end,
Will come when it will come.


turned into:

scared people die a lot of times before their real death, lol.
I know, wtf? anyways, the not scared people never die since they are like, not scared.
zomg, like, of all that stuff I heard, like butt-sex, lololololol,
it seems most wtf to me that people fear death, rofl;
Seeing that you die when you die, a complete end,
will come when it comes, like all zomg and shit.


and

"'Tis very like: he hath the falling sickness.

turned into:

no u"

It was one page of pure ‘wtf, lol’.
last edited on July 14, 2011 4:11PM
Generic Human at 6:34PM, March 6, 2007
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WingNut
I once answered all of my questions on a history test in haiku.

The best part was all the answers were right, and my teacher and I had a ‘talk’ afterward about me putting my creative talents into more productive venues. I still think it was funny as hell. ;D

-W

That's brilliant. I enjoy drawing little cartoons next to my answers demonstrating my answers. Teachers seem to like it.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:34PM
Lsnewton at 4:57AM, March 7, 2007
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For a politics test I answered an entire page of questions with ‘Yoda’.
In maths I once answered a question with a drawing of a crazed owl with the caption ‘the owl dictates that this is an unacceptable question’.
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:48PM
acadia at 6:12AM, March 7, 2007
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I once wrote a paper for a CompSci class. I decided to take a chance on this one, as i really didnt want to write the paper. I wrote the first paragraph and the first sentence of the next paragraph on-topic. After that first sentence, I just chronicled the happenings of the past few days. It lasted about two pages. And in the ‘conclusion’ I described what my dog does to the clothing she steals.

I got a 98. The professor ‘couldnt find any mistakes’ and told me I did a ‘good job’

My highest moment in that class.

last edited on July 14, 2011 10:45AM
Cake Bandit at 8:02AM, March 10, 2007
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I have some answers I always put down for tests, essays, homework

1: communism

2: a drawn picture of a ninja with “YOUR NUMBERS LIE TO NUMBER NINJA!” written next to it on math stuff (tons o' fun on bubblesheets)

3:Before ansering the above question, I'd like you to step outside of your government funded thinking box and ask yourself, “why do I need to know the diagonal through the center of a rabbit hutch if I only own chickens?”

(I don't own animals of any kind)

4: A leprechaun told me that burning this test would make me health, wealth and wise. What are you offering?

5: A recipe for lemon chicken half way through any long enlish paper.
^The above post is likely written light heartedly.
It's not on DD but it's still My Totally Kickass Webcomic
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:35AM
LIZARD_B1TE at 3:47PM, March 10, 2007
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RE Pop Quiz:

Q: What does RCIA stand for?

A: Religious Central Intelligence Agency
last edited on July 14, 2011 1:36PM
ccs1989 at 3:53PM, March 10, 2007
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Oh man, I want to be in a religion class just so I can mock it.
http://ccs1989.deviantart.com

“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.”
-Henry David Thoreau, Walden
last edited on July 14, 2011 11:38AM
emjee at 8:49PM, March 10, 2007
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kingofsnake
Does it strike anyone else as odd as to how many DDers were educated at private schools? We ALL had to take religion classes!
It does. I think I'm one of the few who goes to a school entirely (exept academics of course) art, tech/computers and dance/music. No religiion taught here.
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:21PM
Neilsama at 9:12PM, March 10, 2007
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I never employed much comedy when doing quizes. Occaisionally, I would literally write, “I don't know,” but that was the extent of writing anything humorous. If I could turn back the clock and take biology again, I might be tempted to answer every question with “God did it”. On second thought, intentional failure isn't my bag.

I had much funnier answers on my homework in classes where homework wasn't collected. I had one biology teacher who would simply glance to make sure the homework was done but wouldn't actually collect any of it. I would write stuff like, “I don't care,” “Why the hell are you asking me?”, “If you don't know the answer, then how the heck am I supposed to?”, etc. Never got caught.
last edited on July 14, 2011 2:10PM
fern at 10:57PM, March 10, 2007
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Last week I had a history quiz:

Who was the first known Egyptian Queen?

I answered “Zena”
last edited on July 14, 2011 12:26PM

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