Sex Horoscopes

tea_green at 12:24PM, Feb. 11, 2007
posts: 294
joined: 6-23-2006

Let the games begin! Libra will try anything once. Twice to make sure they liked it. Three times to be absolutely sure. Do not touch a Libra's head during oral sex…that may work with an Aries, but not here. Libras love giving oral. They love getting it, too. But don't feel like they get enough…too bad, because they sure as hell are getting enough of everything else. They will buy toys to make you use it on them. Libras are mental creatures that believe in living and fulfilling fantasies that they haven't done in real life…which is rare because they have done almost everything. They have no problem sploshing. To them, sitting in a pie could be fun. Porn? Bring it on! Sex, video and food? Alright!

They are heavily exhibitionistic by accident. They are accident prone; they lose bras, underwear, condoms. They also accidentally end up in bed with people. Amazing how that works! They like to cross dress. Both sexes do this quite well, actually. Male Librans are mistaken for women all the time, and female Libras are mistaken for men every now and again too. It’s because they are under the goddess Aphrodite. They are never just ONE sex. They can always feel what the opposite sex feels. Which is why they are rarely clingy, except in rare circumstances when they have been led on. Then watch the manipulative side of the scales swing. They love to roleplay and play dress up. They like to dress like hookers or Queen Elizabeth (this is the men, too).

Who are they really? It depends on what day of the week it is. They believe that life is too short to date ugly people in more ways than one. So if you are being shagged by a Libra, there is a good reason. Whether you are attractive physically, emotionally, mentally or have a fantastic sense of humor, there is always a reason for a Libra to be fucking you. But they hate vulgarity. They despise feeling like they are on a waiting list to get your attention. Worse yet, feeling like they are your groupie. That won't last long, then. They have already figured out how to destroy you…now they are biding their time to see how long until they throw you away. But, if you get past all that, expect long luxurious nights talking and playing Strip Tarot or Naked Chess. They are the Graceful Slut…but not slutty and yet accident prone. If you are going to fuck a Libra get mirrors. Lots of them. They have more vanity issues than a Gemini. Nothing is too kinky for them. They are the eternal Courtesan or Concubine. They are sex therapists, porn writers who knows?

last edited on July 18, 2011 10:31AM
gsp at 11:18AM, July 15, 2007
posts: 1
joined: 5-7-2007
ummm… I don't know if any of that is me. I like dogs and good Chinese, can I still be a Libra?
- D
last edited on July 18, 2011 10:31AM
lefarce at 9:24AM, July 28, 2007
posts: 5,454
joined: 2-9-2006
Wow, that's actually pretty accurate…!

last edited on July 18, 2011 10:31AM

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