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Real

Banes at 12:00AM, Dec. 29, 2016
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I ran out of time and didn't finish the Newspost I wanted to; it'll have to wait until next week. It's a cool one!

Instead…this.


It can be a challenge to “be yourself”. It can be difficult to even define what that means. Most people probably behave a little differently depending on the situation they're in or the people they're with.

In my younger years I found myself placating people and often agreeing with others' opinions without even thinking about my own opinion. Maybe I wanted to be liked; sometimes that was it.

But I remember often having no opinion on the subject at hand. Growing up with some strong…maybe overbearing…personalities around must have been part of it. Being agreeable was how I tried to get through the challenges of life. Sometimes it worked out well; sometimes it backfired and annoyed people.

Overcoming being “fake” or insincere is something I've made some efforts at in recent years. Part of it happens naturally, I find; it takes far less work to just be oneself than to try and impress other people with an artificial self. It starts to not matter what other people think. I find this to be a great relief!

But on the other hand, habits are more ingrained and we've heard and experienced more as time goes by, so it can be harder to figure out if we're just acting out old routines or playing a comfortable role without realizing it, or closing ourselves off from new ideas and activities that might be good for us!

As a sometimes-creative artist, this matters to me in other ways as well - am I making stuff that reflects what I want to say? My own point of view? Or am I just regurgitating? Or doing what I think will please people?

Partly, it's the latter; I want the stuff I do to be understood and enjoyed by other people. But I do think the stories reflect something of me, though often mingled with other fiction I've consumed over the years.

So what's the answer? I'm not sure. But it seems like something worth thinking about!

Do you find it difficult to “be yourself” with the comics you create?



Speaking of being yourself, a unique person passed away recently -

Carrie Fisher was an unusual celebrity from what I could tell. Smart, sassy, and really, really funny, she was also open about her struggles with mental health issues and addiction…before it was common to be so open. She helped many people, from what I'm reading, with her warmth, honesty and insight about these issues.

She was an accomplished actor, but also a writer of many successful books and rewrites on some big screenplays. I remember her on the roast of Roseanne; she was very funny. In her many interviews, too, she was always entertaining and often made other actors cover their eyes with her sometimes naughty sense of humour.

Oh, and at around 19, she became a cultural icon, and remains one to this day.


Goodnight, sweet Princess!



comment

anonymous?

bravo1102 at 4:46PM, Dec. 29, 2016

Studies indicate that the great majority of people are incapable of accurate assessment of their own personality traits. So I reserve judgement on what me is real. I wear many masks and play so many roles I lose track of what me is most genuine. Is it the enthusiastic one prone to stuttering, or the calm silent one, or the misanthrope muttering under his breath? People who really know me say that I am a bundle of contradictions. Like someone once said, "I am not certain if this is who I am but it is who I am most comfortable being right now."

usedbooks at 9:06AM, Dec. 29, 2016

I do apply a bit of a filter when I'm in uniform, because I represent a federal agency, not myself. My views are pretty much the same as my employer, so that's handy. Near the end of last summer, my filter came a bit loose and when someone asked my "opinion on global warming," I said, "I don't have an opinion, sir. I have an education." (Which led to a lovely conversation and discussion of a peer-reviewed study we keep at the info desk. Luckily, I hadn't addressed the wrong type of person in that manner.)

usedbooks at 9:01AM, Dec. 29, 2016

The real me is not outspoken, so I'm pretty real. If you ask me something, I'll answer honestly. My manner of speech is pretty diplomatic but not double-speak. Luckily, my latest group of coworkers were all introverts, so declining invitations was much easier. I could say plainly, "I have plans to watch cartoons with my cat." I missed class in grad school once because it slipped my mind while I was taking care of a sick pet rat, so I told my professor, and he expressed his sympathy and let me see his notes and slideshow. I'm candid overall. I don't have that many friends, but I don't lose them.

ozoneocean at 7:38AM, Dec. 29, 2016

I dunno... As we get older we're more comfortable with speaking out, our filters get lower and we get more opinionated. I notice that in myself, I try and mollify that. Being a "yes person" and going along with things that are at odds with your beliefs though can be pretty bad. It's good that we grow out of the need to please and susceptibility to peer pressure, but we shouldn't go to the other extreme.

KimLuster at 4:56AM, Dec. 29, 2016

Ahhh Carrie Fisher! She shall be missed... About being real... It's a battle, but sometimes being civilized requires us to not be. When dealing with your boss... You don't wanna be a 'Yes-Person', but also if you largely don't respect them and often would rather throw a phone at them than say 'hello'... Better to be less real at those moments... Maybe :D

bravo1102 at 1:26AM, Dec. 29, 2016

And the day after she passed, her mother Debbie Reynolds passed. A very problematic relationship but a very deep one. Carrie Fisher's great book Postcards from the Edge was a little more than semi-autobiographical.


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