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Evil Emperor Nick on Oct. 12, 2007

Havenshire Harbinger October 13th 2007

Ask Ms. Tress By Vinessa Tress

Recently I've gotten a lot of gamer related questions so I'm dedicating today's edition of Ask Ms. Tress to answering some of them.



Dear Ms. Tress,

As I'm sure your are well aware recently Halo 3 came out and I was one of the many to pre-order a copy. My girl friend loves to play games on the Wii with me but when we play Halo she complains that “I'm a cheap #$&#*ING LITTLE @#$(# SNIPER #$*( @&*$ CAMPING #$@$%$”. I'm just playing the game, it isn't my fault she gets owned.

-Eleete_Covenant_#57


Eleete,

You've got to understand, sometimes the most effective strategy isn't the most fun way to play the game. Look at this from your girlfriend's perspective. There are a wide variety of weapons and areas in the game. Your repeat sniping however severely limits how she can play the game. If you are constantly sniping it pretty much reduces the sword to paper weight status, and maybe your girl friend would really enjoy impaling you on its plasma generated blades reducing your internal organs to so much blackened ash to match your black alien heart. Try mixing up your strategies, let her pick some custom games sometimes without the sniper rifles.

Dear Ms. Tress,

No one seems to like me when I play Halo. I don't understand.

-Krador02


You %$*# team killing @#$#tard! I remember you. You shot me in the back when we were supposed to be defending area 6 so your friend on the other team could take it. You want some advice? STOP SHOOTING YOUR TEAM MATES IN THE BACK! You my friend better hope I never see you at a cross walk or I'll be going after you like Bruce Willis in Pulp Fiction!

Dear Ms. Tress

Recently I was blessed with a Marriage to a 52nd level necromancer and welcomed into his clan. My girlfriend however is rather upset about this. She says it is creepy for me to get married in game. I've tried explaining I'm only marring him for the stat bonuses and the +5 Deathreaver he promised me. She wants me to kill off this character and start a new male character with her. She doesn't seem to understand that Amazons get 6 unique skills and there just aren't any male Amazons. How can I get her to understand?

-49th level Amazon Hunter


Hunter,

Anything that gives a stat boost to your relationship with your girlfriend is probably more important.