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Brad_Burn on Feb. 23, 2016

A fitting introduction for our woeful protagonist. For those offended by the representation or act of masturbation, take solace in the fact that literally millions of your fellow internet explorers are at this exact moment in time tugging themselves into guilt-ridden exhaustion over anything from a drawing of a giant squid molesting a school girl to a video of an overweight man dressed as a unicorn farting on a chocolate digestive. Go on, picture it. Does this crudely drawn image of a scrawny wastrel flogging his pork sabre in the dark offend you now? I hope so…