Horray!
I do the same thing myself, I post pages with the wrong text, and usually my boyfriend catches it for me (which is funny since english is not his first language, hahahaha!).
Hope to see more from you!!!
thanks!! I changed it soon!
yes, bettie is a bad student
"It is Angela... for some strange reason is my sister", it should be a joke... I believe that itself is not understood
What's your native language?
Panel 1
"I am tired" - too formal. "I'm tired" sounds more natural
"I am university" - ??? makes it sound like she IS the university. I assume you meant something like, "I am a university student"
"very bad by the way" - The university is bad? She is a bad girl? She is a bad student? Given the next phrase I assume you mean the latter.
"and as athlete I am worse" - might sound better as "and a worse athlete"
Panel 2
"It is Angela... for some strange reason is my sister" - ??? Soooooooo Angela was found under a toadstool, or dropped off by a dragon? Or are you trying to emphasize that Angela is a better athlete than Bettie?
"But so that? We even are far" - ??? I'm not sure, but maybe "But so what? We're so far away!"
"It is that... No longer I can" - Another gues "It's that... no farther can I run..."
"We go if you can" - Well since she's not waiting around you probably want, "Catch up when you can."
"Energy has too much" - "She has too much energy"
Hope this helps.
Good art, by the way.
whoaa, looks greeat! the style, the coloring, the emotions shown in the characters, awesome! would be nice to have a background in the pages though. i'll keep an eye on this! ^_^
Kim at 11:24AM, April 29, 2006
Horray! I do the same thing myself, I post pages with the wrong text, and usually my boyfriend catches it for me (which is funny since english is not his first language, hahahaha!). Hope to see more from you!!!
nissan at 9:42AM, April 29, 2006
thanks!! I changed it soon! yes, bettie is a bad student "It is Angela... for some strange reason is my sister", it should be a joke... I believe that itself is not understood
KAM at 8:57AM, April 29, 2006
What's your native language? Panel 1 "I am tired" - too formal. "I'm tired" sounds more natural "I am university" - ??? makes it sound like she IS the university. I assume you meant something like, "I am a university student" "very bad by the way" - The university is bad? She is a bad girl? She is a bad student? Given the next phrase I assume you mean the latter. "and as athlete I am worse" - might sound better as "and a worse athlete" Panel 2 "It is Angela... for some strange reason is my sister" - ??? Soooooooo Angela was found under a toadstool, or dropped off by a dragon? Or are you trying to emphasize that Angela is a better athlete than Bettie? "But so that? We even are far" - ??? I'm not sure, but maybe "But so what? We're so far away!" "It is that... No longer I can" - Another gues "It's that... no farther can I run..." "We go if you can" - Well since she's not waiting around you probably want, "Catch up when you can." "Energy has too much" - "She has too much energy" Hope this helps. Good art, by the way.
nissan at 7:19AM, April 29, 2006
... my english is bad, they can help to me to correct it please.
jxknight at 5:19AM, April 29, 2006
whoaa, looks greeat! the style, the coloring, the emotions shown in the characters, awesome! would be nice to have a background in the pages though. i'll keep an eye on this! ^_^
Cthulhu at 4:09AM, April 29, 2006
forget it,i totally give up on trying to read this.Ill just.....look at the pictures and try to deduct whats happening....
Kim at 12:46AM, April 29, 2006
nice image, but the english is a bit weird.