People do stop..now they think your mexican(and my god,you remind me of my best friend)





I wish for pie

You get pie BLOO BERREE PIE MWAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAH

i wish for the complete red vs blue season 3 dvd

granted, exept you get the seson three of “red vs. blue fish” a showdown between the dr. suess 1 fish 2 fish red fish blue fish book charactors.

I wish for ABSOLUTE POWER!

granted. It's absolute power over the company that paints doorbell buttons.

I wish for 3 MORE WISHES!

…You end up wishing your self out of existance after excerting the last of the 3 wish for another 3 wishes over and over.

I wish for time that I will not notice passing and have it not affect me in any way.

you get it, and it doesn't affect you. But it affects everyone else because they are now dead. You don't realize this (thus not affecting you) because you went mad during the unnoticed time. It still doesn't affect you because you're mad and don't realize.

I wish for the ability to point at something and make it EXPLODE, but I can reverse it if I want.

You point at an innocent iraquian man an blow him up by accident and reverse it,but the iraqian remembers and swaers revenge
Congrats you created osama bin laden

oh god, I mean thanks for the congratulations but I don't think I should be pleased.

For lack of a wish to corrupt,
I wish for ten cute little puppy dogs of which I will love and cherish!

granted You get ten cute little RABID puppy dogs. While you are snuggling one of them they all bite you at the exact same time and you turn into a rabid wearwolf space monkey.

I wish for hang gliding lessons

granted. But they are 2D computer hang-gliding lessons. You also had to pay $793,000.

I wish for my own pet that speaks English, looks awesome and bad-ass, and will never run away from me

You get one, but it doesn't run away from you, it commits suicide after being so smart for it's stupid monkey owner.

I wish to be God

Granted, you don't exist (ooohhhh! sorry if that offended anyone)

I wish I get 101% on all of my final exams without having to do any work

You get a 101% on a final exam drug test.

I wish that people would offer me free stuff all the time

People do give you free stuff, including the garbage man, who gives you everyone's crap… That you don't like.

I wish to fire bend

Poof! You can fire bend now, but you're not very good at it, and accidentally burn your own house down.


I wish I was famous.

you are, but only because of a scandalous sex tape. You then host your own reality show, “Istaerlus' new BFF” and it is cut after episode 3.

I wish that I had an umbrella full of glue that cannot stick on me.

When you open the umbrella the glue falls off and does not stick to you, but then you remember your kindergarten ways and eat the TOXIC glue.

I wish pokemon would go back to its old ways when there were only 150 pokemon

granted, but they are all the new, whorish pokemon

I wish that I had the ability to shoot radioactive spit out of my mouth

granted, you can't eat though because everything literally melts in your mouth

I wish that someone would uncover the obvious truth that Elvis is alive with facts and evidence

granted, but you die beforehand.

I wish that my name was as cool as Wasabli Hargani.

granted, but they mess up on the paper and now your name is cool as wasabli origami

I wish for a patatoe gun

You accidentally shoot your grandma.






I wish I had the complete Star Trek franchise on DVD.

you do, but you are homeless with no money and you cannot buy a DVD player so you sell the DVD you wished for in order to buy a DVD player which you do, but now you have the DVD player and no DVD, so you buy the DVD but only by selling the DVD player. Now you cannot watch the DVD because you sold the DVD player with the money you had from selling the DVD that you wished for. So you sell the DVD in order to get the DVD player. This repeats for 100 years + 5436 years, until you die.

I wish for tan skin

TAN SKIN! this is not possible because you are covered in fur! But if you turned human somehow then I would corrupt this wish like this: You get overtanned and then you look like an oompa loompa

I wish for my own planet of GarBonzo bananas that will obey my every whim!

granted, but they are conquered by the superior OVERLORDS OF THE INTERNET, THE COS-MONKEY-NAUTS!

I need a wish to corrupt! You can go to the moon and smoke but not leave a wish for a banana to corrupt?!

Oh good lord I am positively ASHAMED with myself.

I wish that I could moonwalk BETTER than Michael Jackson himself.

well that sounds like a resonable wish since you are a space monkey. Granted, but then you moonwalk into the street by accident..

I wish for a kickstand for my bike

The bike stands up and kicks you, what exactly did you expect?

I wish the ninja monkeys from venus would stop stealing my easter corn.

granted, you put up the scariest scarcrow ever in scarcrow history and the aliens don't steal your corn. In fact, nobody ever visits your house ever again! Girl scouts, solisitors, and visitors run away screaming from your house. You're so lonley now you wish the aliens DID steal your corn.

I wish for lots of string cheese and a crazy idea (involving the cheese)