I'll give you two big tips, based on things that made this a tiny bit difficult to read.
First and foremost, the primary speaker (the dude who talks first in a panel) always has their bubble first, obviously. In panel three, it's reversed, and therefor, confusing. It makes it seem that the bad guy is talking before Mario, and that just doesn't make sense. Mario's bubble should have been where the bad guy's was, and the bad guy's bubble should have been where Mario's was.
The second tip I've got is that you should try different perspectives to break up the monotony, or general "stiffness" of the comic. Everything happens from one point of view, one size. Try zooming in, or doing different shots. It makes the comic seem more "alive" or active.
Hope the advice helps.
Kristian7 at 12:23PM, Sept. 1, 2008
:D pretty good comic!
Nintendude at 9:15AM, June 14, 2007
that was funny.
lefarce at 7:45PM, June 10, 2007
I'll give you two big tips, based on things that made this a tiny bit difficult to read. First and foremost, the primary speaker (the dude who talks first in a panel) always has their bubble first, obviously. In panel three, it's reversed, and therefor, confusing. It makes it seem that the bad guy is talking before Mario, and that just doesn't make sense. Mario's bubble should have been where the bad guy's was, and the bad guy's bubble should have been where Mario's was. The second tip I've got is that you should try different perspectives to break up the monotony, or general "stiffness" of the comic. Everything happens from one point of view, one size. Try zooming in, or doing different shots. It makes the comic seem more "alive" or active. Hope the advice helps.
DragoonX at 7:18PM, June 10, 2007
Not bad at all. Just make it more obvious who is talking in panels like #3