Chapter 2 Page 9 - Bold & Daring
Evil Emperor Nick on June 23, 2008
I've been poking around TVTropes.org, which despite its name now includes web comics, trying to find some Tropes Cwen fits into. I guess though I'm a little to close to my own work ‘cause I always things like “Well that isn’t quite what I did” so I ask you my readers, what Tropes do you feel Cwen fits into at the moment?
Legend of the Clan
Written by: E.E. Nick
The wet-tail clan walked across the plain in the early morning sunlight while the land was still cool and covered with soft dew from which the wet-tails took there name. Talon Clawfang their leader sniffed the air, a strange scent was on the wind.
At first Clawfang thought it might be a shellback or a grass sling or maybe even an asshat but as the wind changed and Talon got a better wiff he knew; one of the brown wolf clan had taken a crap in their plain. The rest of the pack caught the sent and was soon in frenzy.
“Clawfang!” Bloodrip called. “The brown wolves have been here…..and they left a present.”
“I…gwa….smell it too.” Clawfang said. “The scent if fresh. He can't be far. We'll find him and when we do I'll liberally spray the ground with his various bodily fluids!”
“Yes Alpha!” Bloodrip barked. “Nipkill, Glandsniffer, come with me!”
Just then a toot broke the stillness of the morning and the whole of the wet-tail clan wirled around. Bluetongue leapt into the brush and dragged out a small brown wolf who whined softly before the mighty Clawfang.
“Yes, this is the one.” Clawfang confirmed with sniff, then a snort and a gag. “Any last words before I…*sniff, sniff*…I….mean my beta here rips you too your bones?”
“Me?” Bloodrip whined. “Why do have to bite him? Can't the Omega do it?”
“Droolsnap?” Clawfang said. “You want to leave this to Droolsnap? Do you remember how he got the name Droolsnap?!?! It took him like half a sun cycle to kill that rabbit and it only had three legs!”
“Well could we at least wash him first?” Bloodrip asked. “At least let me drag him around in the grass or something.”
“Please Talon Clawfang.” The brown wolf pleaded. “I am Bob of the brown wolf clan.”
“I know of your clan and their strange ways!” Clawfang snapped. “You should never have come here!”
“Please Talon Clawfang hear me. My own clan, the brown tails is being attacked by the moose clans.” Bob explained.
“The what?” Bloodrip growled at him.
“Um…the a rackskulls.” Bob explain.
“Yes the Rackskulls. My ancestors chased this blight from the land long ago.” Clawfang said thoughtfully.
“But they have returned! And even now they ravage the other clans with flat teeth and tall antlers.” Bob said. “Plesae Talon Clawfang. Only your tribe is strong enough to defeat the Rackskulls.”
Clawfang looked down and scowled at Bob.
“How dare the brown wolf clan ask me to come to their aid. Do you know what the brown wolves did to me. Many moons ago I was once…” Clawfang began.
“All our males were killed battling the Rackskulls. Our clan only consists of myself and about a hundred she-wolves.”
“……” Clawfang said, then after a moment. “Wet-tails, we go to aid the Brown Wolf Clan!”
“Yay!” Said the Wet-tails.
The next say the Wet-tails gathered together and headed out with Bob to find the Brownwolf clan. When Bob was up ahead Bloodrip fell back and spoke with his leader.
“Talon, I do not trust this Bob.” Bloodrip whispered to Clawfang. “He claims the rackskulls slaughtered the rest of his clan's males, so how did he survive? He is small even for a brownwolf. The rackskulls could have squashed his guts till they exploded out his ears. I think he means to trick us.”
Clawfang considered Bloodrip's warning, but then looked over at Bob who was sniffing a bush and ended up taking a thorn to the nose. “I think you give him too much credit, maybe he was just lucky; really, really ungodly lucky.” Clawfang suggested.
Bloodrip however wasn't disarmed by this. “Dismiss it if you will Talon, but I'll be keeping an eye on him. A close eye on him…from as far upwind of him as I can get.”
And that said Bloodrip trotted off to his self appointed task.
The Wet-Tail clan left its plain and to the forest of the Brown Wolves traveling quickly and quietly at night to avoid warning the rackskulls until one day they at last arrived at the cave the Brownwolves called home.
“Bob!” A brown she-wolf cried out as they approached. “You came back! (We all though the Wet-Tails had eaten you for sure.)”
“Shelly, this is Talon Clawfang of the Wet-Tails.” Bob said by way of introduction.
“Our heroes!” The Brown Wolf clan cried.
“Now wait just a moment.” An old voice croaked out. “I know of these Wet-Tails and I do not trust them.”
From out of the cave trotted an ancient wolf. His face heavy with the wisdom of years and his fur all gray and white.
“I thought you said you were the only male left.” Clawfang snapped quietly at Bob.
“I am. That is Jasper, he lost his kibbles and bits to a cougar….” Bob started.
“ …Long ago the wet-tails once roamed in these lands but they chose to leave the forest….” Jasper was yapping.
“A what?” Clawfang asked.
“Er….a feline…..um meowkill? pouncepurr? Non-saber saber?” Bob fumbled for the right term.
“…and so by a two to three vote the commitee recommended that the wet tails…” Jasper continued.
'Ah, a pussy.“ Clawfang said, knowledge dawning on him.
”Yea whatever.“ Bob replied.
”…and further the resolution was passed never again to have our clans mingle with the wet-tails!“ Jasper concluded shouting. ”Now if you want to ignore the great wisdom of the the advisory commitee! If you want to just start ignoring the edict of the elders! If you want to….!
“Bloodrip.” Clawfang said.
“Yea boss.” Bloodrip replied.
“Eat him.” Clawfang commanded.
“Do I have to? Can't I have Tailtwitch do it. I just ate a bunch of mushrooms and I'm not feeling too….” Bloodrip began.
“I don't care if you ate a whole stomplizard I want you to eat this guy.” Clawfang said.
“Couldn't I just maim him a bit?” Bloodrip asked.
“…so you go ahead then just toss that to wind too. Sure why not just start letting YIPE!” Jasper's speach was cut short as Shelly ate his face with a crunching sound.
“Sorry. About that.” Shelly explained between mouthfuls of Jasper. “You were saying Clawfang?”
“DIBS!” Bloodrip shouted.
“Damn it!” Clawfang shouted.
“What?” Asked Shelly.
“Oh nothing.” Clawfang explained. “Er anyway,fear no more Brownwolves we of the Wet-tail clan have come to rescue you from the skullracks! And afterwards if you need help repopulating your clan, we've also come to help with that too.” Clawfang said concluding his speech. “Together we can build a new clan: stronger, better, faster, harder! We have the wolves for it. We can boldly go where no wolf has gone before. This is one small step for brownwolves one giant leap for wolfkind. We have nothing to fear but fear itself and rackskulls….”
“You're losing them.” Bloodrip whispered.
“And um…everyone should have a really nice day.” Clawfang concluded.
“Yay!” Shouted the wet-tails.
“Whatever!” Shouted the Brownwolves.
The next day the Wet-tails patroled the brownwolf's domain. At first everything was quiet, but then suddenly.
“Clawfang! Clawfang!” Nipkill shouted and he dashed out of the brush wounded. “Talon Clawfang! The Rackskulls! They're coming with their flat teeth and broad antlers!”
“Wet-tails!” Clawfang shouted. “To me!”
The Wet-tails lept to their leader. Soon the ground shook with a great rumbling and they could all hear the haunting cries of the Rackskulls.
The Rackskulls came upon the Wet-Tails like a storm, charging through their ranks the scattering the wolves like rice at a wedding. It soon became clear that the wet-tails were no match for their enemy.
Bloodrip, bloodied and dazed from a kick to the head pulled out of the battle. “Bob!” He shouted. “This is all his fault.”
He looked around and spotted Bob cowering behind a bit of shrubbery trying to keep from being noticed in the fight.
“YOU!' Bloodrip roared. ”This is all your fault!“
”Noooo!“ Bob squeaked.
”You brought us here!“ Bloodrip yelled.
”Yea but you guys were supposed to save us, not suck it up!“ Bob yelled back.
At this Bloodrip lost it and roared wordlessly and lept at Bob, the two of them going down is a tussle of flying fur. Their battle however was short lived as the two rolled on the ground into the path of one of the Rackskull who unceremoniously punted the two wolves through the air. Bloodrip and Bob landed in a sprawl in front of the rackskull and it began to charge at them.
”Bloodrip!“ Clawfang yelled seeing his beta's impending doom.
Bloodrip looked up and still stunned stuggled to his feet only to collapse again unable to move, Bob for his part was merely paralysed with fear of the gaint anterlered creatures about to mash him up like potato for dinner. And then Bob's fear over came him, and he pooped.
The rackskull suddenly screamed to a stop, grinding its hooves into the ground to stop itself midcharge. It made a horrible face at the two wolves and snorted, turned a sickly shade of green and then threw up. Shortly after looking unsteady the Rackskull turned around and sauntered off away from the two wolves. For a moment Bloodrip and Bob just looked in disbelief.
”Did you do that last time they attacked?“ Bloodrip asked.
”Yes…..“ Bob said ashamed.
”Clawfang!“ Bloodrip shouted. ”I know how to turn back the rackskulls!“
Many days later, after the rackskulls had been turned back in a dramatic, epic but ultimately too disgusting battle to relate here, Clawfang called all the wolves together.
”My friends.“ Clawfang began. ”We have come along way and fought a hard fight. We now have a duty to protect this land against the rackskulls, a duty we cannot hope to do alone. So let it be know that from this day forward the wet-tail and brownwolf clans are no more; a single unified clan guards this forest against the rackskulls and all who would threaten us and our pups! So embrace your new pack mates!“
”Yay!“ Said the wet-tails.
”Whatever." Said the brownwolves.
And thus it was that a new clan was born who would be forever known as the Browntails.
CryForE at 9:40AM, May 9, 2009
I'm not sure that he knows what he's saying in the last panel doesn't match his expression or movements :P
lucrotiasmaw at 6:59AM, March 24, 2009
oooooooooooops forgot to rate!
lucrotiasmaw at 6:58AM, March 24, 2009
uber latching (epich leg hump) yay hookers(possibly twins) what fun ahahahahahahahaha
HeirOfEzekiel at 3:34PM, Jan. 1, 2009
I'm sure he needs a brave and courageous companion for such dangerous adventures. Where can I sign up?
The Derkomai at 2:39PM, Nov. 26, 2008
He's so noble. *swoon*
GoGo Ghosty at 5:07PM, Nov. 17, 2008
.......
Animetor_Lily at 8:56AM, Aug. 31, 2008
OMG xDDD The final panel is so funny~
giovanni at 7:50AM, Aug. 28, 2008
plundering? hes a hack
Evil Emperor Nick at 7:05AM, June 26, 2008
Righter13: There is certainly a lot of daring involved. Pnx: Heh. Good point.
Pnx at 5:13PM, June 25, 2008
Yeknow we have no way to know how much that coin is actually worth. It could be the equivalent of $.50, $5, or even something like $25, we have no basis to tell the value of currency there... Who am I kidding it's probably worth 5 cents.
Righter13 at 9:38AM, June 25, 2008
those are some "heroic acts" he speaks of
Evil Emperor Nick at 7:48AM, June 25, 2008
lady elva: Indeed the grip of a little girl is nigh unbreakable. roycemarie: Ouch harsh but probably deserved. BrendanPN: Wait are we talking about Smarm or STDs? CloverLeaf: Nothing ever ends well. Imola: Hehe you know me to well.
Imola at 11:02PM, June 24, 2008
Short story... I smell ferret inspiration.
CloverLeaf at 8:17PM, June 24, 2008
How did I miss not one, but two updates. D: Anyways, the last three were all lovely pages. Heh, this story isn't going to end well.
BrendanPN at 7:14PM, June 24, 2008
its like a virus, it infects and reinfects the host.
roycemarie at 11:41AM, June 24, 2008
This guy is such a looser.
lady elva at 9:50AM, June 24, 2008
ROFLMAO! I love the last panel! XD Gram should know that once a little girl is attached to your leg, they can't let go, they're like little leeches, I know, I use to be one, XD
Evil Emperor Nick at 9:32AM, June 24, 2008
kyupol: It is a good problem to have most times. TheTim: I like the way you think. Ikaru Sentinal: I'm glad you noticed Lord Attez's cameo. It seems like forever since we last saw him.
Ikaru Sentinal at 9:04AM, June 24, 2008
*giggles* Did anyone else notice whose face is on that coin? Cwen's dearest daddy. *chuckles* He sure is not worht much now is he? XD And the last panel is BEAUTIFUL! I LOVE his expression! And his lines....hilarious. Glorious. He needs to DIE. An the short story...Browntails...*laughing* Oh wow....so....hilarious and disgusting....way to go.
TheTim at 7:40AM, June 24, 2008
50GP?! (or whatever the currency may be) Looks like it was well worth her efforts! She could probably buy a wood sword or something now! Now she could go and kill stuff herself and have stuff to bring to the "Sell-Yer-Crap" shop (which is a darn good name for that type of establishment). She could double that in no time! Like 3 months or something! She just needs to find an NPC to give her some crappy grind quests! Gram is obviously a great hero the way he refuses to expose a young lady of seven to such daring acts! I assume those women at the end of the page are healers. Obviously he would need their... services... after a long adventure wrought with danger. And the bar is where he'll be able to both relax and find leads on new quests while showing his appreciation to the healers! Wow! Who'd have thought that wolves would come up the an idea like biological warfare?
kyupol at 7:26AM, June 24, 2008
thats one of the problems of being a chick magnet. lol
Evil Emperor Nick at 7:00AM, June 24, 2008
Raccoo: That is the Brownwolf spirit! Tantz Aerine: I think Gram would call it a pocket book. Chameleon Kid: Well I thought the key here was not to over use the crude humor myself. Seriously I wish I could show you the pages Sarah has done now, the expressions are really funny, but I'm afraid you'll just have to wait until next week.
Evil Emperor Nick at 6:56AM, June 24, 2008
Voting Incentives have been updated now. I appalogize but I haven't been feeling well and forgot to do that last night.
Chameleon Kid at 4:46AM, June 24, 2008
*ROFL* An "epic but ultimately too disgusting battle to relate..." *LMAO* XDD And here I was thinking crude humor was overused--yet this little skit showed quite well that it's still funny! >X} As for the comic: *ROFL* In that last panel, our "noble princely fellah" looks hilarious! X} I swear, Sarah is just getting better and better at facial expressions and poses! =D
Tantz_Aerine at 12:07AM, June 24, 2008
I hope she pinches his purse while she's clinging. XD