Stepped in what?

lba on April 5, 2008

I think I will always remember some of the phrases my dad has always uttered throughout my life since I was young. things like “Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey” or “you don't know dirt from dog shit” will always remain in my mind ( Jeez, I'm making it sound like he's dead or something. ). Quite frankly I think we all have to thank this colourful gentleman and his unusual phrases who raised me, as were it not for him I highly doubt I would be sitting here typing this after creating this little thing which has somehow enraged a number of people in various communites ( Most of them have a problem with jokes about smashing turtles or torture chambers offering free refreshments it seems. ). The reason I bring this up is that more than anything else, it was those phrases he uttered throughout my life that led me to my own sense of humor ( Or lack thereof. ). That of course is the sense of humor that has caused me while on a ski trip watching a couple of younger boys ( I was a brash young 15 or so myself. ) over-dressing to an alarming degree for the level of exercise involved and outside temperature, decided to in the most sensitive and polite manner I could inform them that they were over-dressing. I believe my exact words were “Make sure you don't forget to put on your testicle socks too.” I am told that when their mother several yards away overheard my helpful advice, she nearly had a conniption fit. So, as a result of my father's influence along with my own natural tendency towards honesty ( A bad habit, I know. ) it has apparently turned into some sort of monster that will eventually eat all of our brains. But until then I suppose we should thank my dad. He's the one who gave me my sense of humor. So send him your emails saying how much you hate my jokes, it's his fault.