I just wanted your fish anyway

lba on April 30, 2008

I'm pretty sure this is the exact sort of thing my cats would say if they could ( They're still having trouble with words beginning in vowels. ). The only time that they even pretend to like me is when I'm opening a can. It doesn't even matter what happens to be in that can, they just sit there and give me a look that clearly says, “If you don't give me that, I swear to the great gods of catnip I will start shedding all over your belongings.” This is probably the nicest look they give me, and it's only because somewhere within their minds they realize that I have one major advantage: I'm 5 1/2 taller than them. And quite frankly, I use this advantage for all it's worth. Because it means I can hold the tuna out of their reach, and I get the power. At least until they remember that they have fur, and I have allergies.

One of these days, I'll get them back when I find a 200 pound allegra pill and put it to good use. They'll never know what fell on them.